418 Comments
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oraxx's avatar

I have a few questions for the intelligent design crowd. How does I.D. explain schizophrenia? Childhood cancers? Muscular dystrophy and a thousand other things we would be much better off without? The evolutionary model explains it. Mutations happen and there is overwhelming evidence for it. Is your fallback position something about God testing our faith? Why does he present tests of character he knows the outcome of in advance? Intelligent design is creationism in a cheap suit, and a concept unsupported by any kind of objective evidence. Conservative Christians just can't leave God out of anything. For I.D. to be true, almost everything we think we know about the life sciences has to be wrong.

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Joe King's avatar

Their entire model is "it was designed so evolution isn't real". They don't understand that in order to replace the theory of evolution, you have to not only show how it doesn't work, you have to account for the mountain range of data that shows it does.

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oraxx's avatar

Creationists have always assumed the biblical account of creation wins by default if they can discredit evolution. It never seems to register that they have any obligation to prove their own point, and that merely attacking Darwin doesn't do that. If the Bible really is the word of God, then you would think the discoveries of science would be confirming those stories, rather than contradicting them.

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Joe King's avatar

They cling to it so hard that they redefine evolution so they can use evolution to fit all the animals on Noah's magic zoo boat.

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Sko Hayes's avatar

Thinking of a cartoon I saw last week of 2 Tyrannosaurus Rex standing on a dry hill with rain pouring down watching the Ark sail away...

"Oh shit, was that today?"

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oraxx's avatar

They excel at generating post-hoc rationalizations. They have to get those dinosaurs on the boat somehow.

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Bill Lawrence's avatar

Heck, just the food for the elephants would crowd out most animals on board!

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oraxx's avatar

The methane build-up would have killed every living thing on boad.

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

And Noah wasn't that bright.

https://tinyurl.com/24arf7en

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

Man ... some people are just allergic to rational thought!

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cdbunch's avatar

But homosexuality is unnatural.

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Matri's avatar

They seem to think that proving 0.01% of all the evidence is wrong discredits the entire 99.99%.

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scenario's avatar

They believe in faith. Faith is believing absolutely in something without a shred of evidence. Evidence is evil. That's why they tend to be susceptible to conspiracy theories.

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Missael Silvestre's avatar

Something something "mysterious ways".

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

AKA "We have no excuse for evils caused by our loving perfect gawds."

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Kiwiwriter47's avatar

Illnesses like that are designed to punish people who are not evangelical Christians who voted for the Bloated Yam and pack their homes with more firepower than 45th Royal Marine Commando, of course.

Unless they HAPPEN to such people, in which case, it's "God's proof that He gives us no more than we can handle, and chooses us to bear this cross because we have the faith to bear it."

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oraxx's avatar

If anything, evangelicals get sick at a higher rate than the general population given their tendencey to avoid getting vaccinated.

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Kiwiwriter47's avatar

Yes, they believe that faith and prayer will save them.

During COVID, one of the best examples of black humor I ever saw were the Facebook feeds of anti-Vaxxers denouncing the vaccine and COVID for the usual reasons -- mostly that it was a Deep State libtard hoax, no worse than 24-hour flu.

Until they got COVID.

Then they made desperate pleas on their Facebook pages, begging people to take COVID seriously, get their shots, and asking for "prayer warriors" to help them recover.

Which were invariably followed by the anti-Vaxxer's relative telling the "prayer warriors" that the afflicted looney tune had died...of COVID.

I mean, "24-hour flu."

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oraxx's avatar

It's amazing how people managed to bypass many years of education and became experts on immunology and infectious diseases by spending twenty minutes on line.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Twenty minutes ? You are generous.

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oraxx's avatar

Twenty minutes applies to those who stuck around for graduate level studies. /s

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Kiwiwriter47's avatar

That's all it takes.

The same is true in the physical sciences...look at the Flat-Earthers.

Most importantly, all you need is decent web design skills, an advertiser to pay the bills, a penknife to grind, and suddenly you can become a global political media pundit...at age 15.

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

One of my very kkatlik cousins died a very painful death by cancer. I am sure she thanked jesus for taking her at 48.

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Kiwiwriter47's avatar

I am sorry about your loss...48 is much too early.

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ericc's avatar

𝐻𝑜𝑤 𝑑𝑜𝑒𝑠 𝐼.𝐷. 𝑒𝑥𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑠𝑐ℎ𝑖𝑧𝑜𝑝ℎ𝑟𝑒𝑛𝑖𝑎?

Satan!

𝐶ℎ𝑖𝑙𝑑ℎ𝑜𝑜𝑑 𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑐𝑒𝑟𝑠?

Punishment for evil gays!

𝑀𝑢𝑠𝑐𝑢𝑙𝑎𝑟 𝑑𝑦𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑜𝑝ℎ𝑦

The divine is incomprehensible! Aka "don't worry your pretty little head about it" theology.

𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑎 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑠𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 𝑤𝑒 𝑤𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑏𝑒 𝑚𝑢𝑐ℎ 𝑏𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑜𝑓𝑓 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑡?

Suffering is good!

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oraxx's avatar

They always come up with an answer that works for them. Facts and reason need not apply.

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cdbunch's avatar

The ghoul of Kolkatta is dead. May her evil die with her.

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Holytape's avatar

The answer is "poof" God. And if that isn't good enough, then the more detailed answer is "POOF" GOD!

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Bill Wilson's avatar

All these maladies can be accounted for by Intelligent Design if the first proposition of it is that the designer is of low intelligence.

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

𝐻𝑜𝑑𝑔𝑒 𝑟𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑛𝑑𝑒𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑚 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝐼𝐷 𝑖𝑠 “𝑎𝑔𝑛𝑜𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑐, 𝑚𝑒𝑎𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑖𝑡 𝑜𝑛𝑙𝑦 𝑝𝑟𝑜𝑝𝑜𝑠𝑒𝑠 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑑 𝑜𝑓 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑠𝑐𝑖𝑜𝑢𝑠𝑛𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑏𝑒ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑑𝑒𝑠𝑖𝑔𝑛 𝑜𝑓 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑢𝑛𝑖𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑠𝑒...

To which I say, without blinking, HORSE SHIT! I have to take a guess and say that no one considering that bill is even remotely aware of the case of Kitzmiller v Dover, wherein Intelligent Design was so utterly and thoroughly SCRAPPED that one could pick up the pieces with an eyedropper. West Virginia's high school ranking is already near the bottom of the barrel at #42. Apparently, they really want to go for 50.

Or, more likely, they are yielding what authority they have to the Christian nationalists of the Mountain State because ... reasons? Regardless, they are doing the children of West Virginia a considerable disservice, never mind opening themselves up to yet more litigation regarding the teaching of pseudo-science.

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Joe King's avatar

Oh, they are probably aware of Kitzmiller. They just pretend it didn't happen, the way they ignore bible verses they find inconvenient. World class cherry pickers won't limit their sport to religion.

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User's avatar
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Jan 18, 2024
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Troublesh00ter's avatar

And I would not expect to see any such philosophy class at anything lower than the college level. Such discussion at the high school level would be unusual, with the possible exception of Advanced Placement courses.

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ericc's avatar

It's simple enough in principle to create one at the HS level. For most districts, all you need is written letters from ~30 student families/parents that say "my kid would take this class" and the school or district can create an elective for it.

Which just goes to show how few people want it. And of course, an elective doesn't accomplish the not-so-hidden purpose of evangelism, since an elective doesn't force any non-christian to be told about ID. They know all the nones and even moderate Christians will just not take it. Which is IMO one big reason that not even fundie Christians who would attend that class want them.

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Joe King's avatar

"If this revised bill passes, their science teacher still couldn’t discuss Intelligent Design in class."

It won't stop them from trying. Dressing up creationism as (un)intelligent design just makes it science-y sounding, and they think that is real science, because of the decades of science denialism that is clouding their understanding.

They so desperately want evolution to be wrong in order to maintain their status as God's special snowflakes that they will do anything to be allowed to lie to children about what science has actually discovered.

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Missael Silvestre's avatar

All right class we will be discussing how the massive Jotun Ymir became the worldand the nine realms. What? It's how the universe came into being. What do you mean "not like that"?

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Kiwiwriter47's avatar

We should also discuss "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Universe," which explains how the Earth will be destroyed.

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

And rebuilt!

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Kiwiwriter47's avatar

Yes, indeed.

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Karola Spring's avatar

42 and “Sorry for the inconvenience.”

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Kiwiwriter47's avatar

I always wondered if "42" honored Times Square, Mariano Rivera, or Jackie Robinson.

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Joe King's avatar

That is incorrect. We all know the universe was sneezed from the nose of the Great Green Arkleseizure.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Actually it's Ptah, he spoke our world into creati... Wait it reminds me of something.

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RegularJoe's avatar

The evidence is hidden in the veins of the treacle mines.

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Violet Likes Pretty Flowers's avatar

Eager Student: "Teacher, where does the infinite stack of turtles come into this?"

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Annoyed teacher : "Open your book at page 17 and read at loud voice."

"Discword is not the only Discworld in the known universe since at the conclusion of The Light Fantastic, eight eggs hatch into eight baby Discworlds, which are no doubt travelling through Space and spreading the astrochelonian model of world formation,"

"https://discworld.fandom.com/wiki/Great_A%27Tuin"

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Karola Spring's avatar

I was thinking along the same lines. Each culture has a creation / destruction myth and each of these would be valid under the vague ‘consciousness’ dribble the Christian right are proposing. Should this bill pass teachers would be free to teach mythology as solid ‘fact’. If the teachers or students who want to learn more about the ‘factual’ creation of the universe as the Atlanteans or Lemurians understood it, then it must be taught.

Would the legislators, Pastors, parents, school administrators allow that? Of course not. No matter how they window dress ‘consciousness’ it’s their religious beliefs they want to forcibly teach as fact.

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Val Uptuous NotAgain's avatar

Keep chipping away at the education system, you will only get stupider and stupider representatives in your government who will propose bills like this that don’t actually change the laws or do what they think they do. Keep wasting everyone’s time and taxes on ineffective, ludicrous, religious territory markings. It’s not like it causes issues and drags down the state, or anything.

This is the government we get when we let the FOP run roughshod over the fucking constitution as we have been doing. This is not what we deserve, this is what we’ve been modeled into accepting.

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XJC's avatar

"We?" This is West Virginia we're talking about. A shithole state.

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Val Uptuous NotAgain's avatar

Well, they’re trying to do the same thing in all the states.

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Bensnewlogin's avatar

Intelligent design may explain how humanity came to be, but it doesn't explain how the designer was so stupid that he decided to run the ureter from the kidney to the penis in men through the prostate gland, or why the prostate gland swells as men get older, making it harder and harder to urinate-- the urination, not the penis -- and it can kill you if it gets bad enough.

Prostate glands are proof positive that intelligent design is a myth.

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cdbunch's avatar

External testicles was also a poor design decision. As was crossing the trachea and esophagus. Not to mention an immune system that can overreact to peanut dust and kill you.

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Violet Likes Pretty Flowers's avatar

Saw a comedian deal with this once - god had supposedly finished making all the stuff and had gotten drunk on the seventh day, then one of his minions brought it to his attention that he hadn't attached testicles to man. god just drunkenly slurs "jus' hang 'em somewhere, jeez..."

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Guerillasurgeon's avatar

Or as Billy Connolly put it "we've got a bit of elbow skin going spare"

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Violet Likes Pretty Flowers's avatar

This guy ^ compared it to elbow skin too - maybe the same guy? lol

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ericc's avatar

Actually that one's pretty decent as adaptations go. Sperm production creates a lot of heat, and if it's internal there's no place for that heat to go and so sperm production slows down/gets less efficient/produces less viable sperm. And let's face it, as far as evolution is concerned "moar better sperm" is a lot more important than "cdbunch comfort and vulnerabilty to ball kicks."

To put it another way, your sex engine needed a radiator. Nature did what good engineers do when they want an efficient radiator, and increased the surface area. :)

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cdbunch's avatar

It makes sense with evolution, but not if sperm was also designed. It should have been designed to not require a radiator as the female contribution is.

And it's not just kicks. It's possible to sit on the damn things.

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ericc's avatar

The female system obeys the the same thermodynamics, it just doesn't produce millions of eggs per day. The problem is not really about sperm or egg where a biological redesign could fix it. It's basic chemistry; in subsystems with a very high rate of reaction, you generally have higher heat production.

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cdbunch's avatar

And why is the design to create millions of sperm a day? Why was the design such that millions are sent so one can win?

Every reason why external testicles are needed are obviated when the whole system from the chemistry up was supposedly designed.

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

So men can spend all day praying to be forgiven for wasting sperm. That is SO godlike.

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

Wasting sperm is a mortal sin. (See Onan.) Every male commits millions of mortal sins daily. Every day you keep making more, creating ever increasing backlogs of mortal sins. An act of contrition is required for each sin. Good luck getting that done.

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nmgirl's avatar

When my dad had prostate surgery, I decided that was Eve's revenge.

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

The same fucking jesus that gave me a clogged arteries cuz I seldom eat meat. The same jeezy that made me diabetic and gave me numb feet wracked with intense pain. Bladder and prostate cancer. The same evil jesus that made me gay and then pushes a book calling for my murder. FUCK YOU VERY MUCH jeezybitch!!!

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

My favorite, toes. I thank the DNA defect who got me to take a shortcut on evolution 😁

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

Did I mention the Covid foisted on me by your minions bated in your infected blood?

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Richard Wells's avatar

Even in the scriptures the intelligent designer kept messing up. Humans bad - evict from garden; everything bad - make flood; language/architecture bad - make Babel. Moving on: humans bad - make Jesus - still bad - kill Jesus. C'mon.

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Donrox's avatar

My favorite old joke about ID. "If humans were created by an intelligent designer, why did they run a sewer through the playground?"

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Why there are animals with the anus near the mouth ?

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MalibuMan's avatar

I guess a blow job and anal sex are in the same vicinity.

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cdbunch's avatar

I still have trouble understanding why anyone performs anilingus.

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

The producer/director pays them.

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

I'll stipulate that hygiene has to be VERY good ... but that said, I've known at least two people, one man and one woman, who were SO sensitive anally that they both were orgasmic that way.

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cdbunch's avatar

But..but.. anything but PIV is a sin even for heterosexuals.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

I like sex but it's one of two things I will never do (both giving and receiving). Even if my partner(s) disinfect this area.

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MalibuMan's avatar

Once you set them on a fire hydrant for about an hour to ensure cleanliness, it is quite fun.

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cdbunch's avatar

You could have just prepped for a colonoscopy and I still don't think I could do it.

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Guerillasurgeon's avatar

Near? Jellyfish use the same orifice I do believe.

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Matri's avatar

Turtles too, IIRC.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

I think you are confusing two different things. Turtles have an anus, you can't have a cloaca otherwise.

Bonne lecture https://www.mcgill.ca/oss/article/did-you-know/turtles-breathe-out-their-butt

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Matri's avatar

Well which one expels urea from their mouths?

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

GS told it earlier

It's jellyfish.

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Len Koz's avatar

Why do breathing and eating share a tube? That doesn't seem very intelligent.

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Matri's avatar

I’d like to ask them why, if humans were made in God’s image and therefore the pinnacle of God’s creations, why does the octopus/mantis shrimp have the superior eyesight?

Although this does explain why God’s aim is so horribly terrible that it ONLY smites the Bible Belt instead of sinners. *gives the fourth wall a pointed stare*

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

If man was made in god's image and woman man's why women are the only ones who had/have to veil themselves ?

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MalibuMan's avatar

Because men didn't like other men checking out their chick.

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MalibuMan's avatar

Characteristics (such as design) within objects can only be recognized if there are things that do not possess these characteristics. If people claim that the universe is designed, then they are basically saying everything is designed since the universe encompasses all of existence. If everything has design, then nothing lacks design. How can we recognize design in the first place if there are no examples of things that lack it?

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

Golden showers can be fun, join the holy orgy Kama Sutra, everyone! My apologies to "HAIR!"

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Here's what Zakir Abdul Karim Naik, an Indian Islam public orator who focuses on comparative religion, had to say:

"A human eye is perfectly designed therefore cannot come from evolution."

Need I point out that Dr. Naik wears glasses?

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cdbunch's avatar

An octopus eye has no blind spot.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Alien theory "No fossile of an octopus had ever been found therefore octopus are aliens".

Who will be the first to win a non-prize by telling me the problem with that sentence ?

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

There is no "e" in fossil. *eagerly checks mail for No-Prize*

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larry parker's avatar

The French like extra 'e's like the English like extra 'u's.

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

The original was in English. French a local oddity?

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

You are the ones missing letters right and left 😋

Neron/Nero, Apollon/Apollo, Pluton/Pluto...

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cdbunch's avatar

IIRC, octopi have no bones

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

Copycat!!!

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cdbunch's avatar

You hit post in the middle of my sentence.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

P'tet ben qu'oui, ptet ben qu'non

https://ibb.co/F8YW9hR

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

A few minutes ago both showed 5 minutes. That is why I posted copycat.

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

Then how do they reproduce?

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cdbunch's avatar

You do your own Google search for octopi porn.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Nobody won. Alien theory shouldn't exist (except as a comedy show) 😋

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

They have no bones, Mr. Kotter!!!

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

4 errors. 2 commas, a misspelling and octopi having no bones.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Disqualified for answering twice.

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larry parker's avatar

Missing a comma?

? because I am not an English major.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Why would an octopus be in coma ? 🤔

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larry parker's avatar

Too many shellfish?

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

Remember this?

larry parker

Jan 16

You might not make it two more days. : )

Well, 🖕

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

Diabetic coma?

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

Now, who's missing letters?

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

No te entiendo el niño.

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

I read somewhere that the eye evolved seven or eight separate times.

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

In a land of blind people a one-eyed man would be king.

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Vanity Unfair's avatar

But see; H G Wells: The country of the blind.

http://www.online-literature.com/wellshg/3/

There are probably more readable versions online or a trip to your local library should produce one.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Didn't one of the Cosmos series under Neil deGrasse Tyson cover the subject? I seem to remember that.

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

I haven't seen any of his.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

You can watch both Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey and Cosmos: Possible Worlds for free on Tubi (just continue as a guest).

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Zizzer-Zazzer-Zuzz's avatar

"Two Hurricane High School juniors, Hayden Hodge and Hunter Bernard, promoted the bill to the panel."

Today's bill is brought to you by the letter "H".

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cdbunch's avatar

Does Master Bernard have a laptop?

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Bet both their first paying jobs will include the phrase "You want fries with that?"

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Kay-El's avatar

If there is an Intelligent Designer (spoiler alert: nope) they get a F in creating religion because religion is an underlying cause in many of the world’s ills, see also war, inquisition, crusades, Holocaust, P01135809

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Old Man Shadow's avatar

I don't know the exact percentages, but a lot of Christians, Muslims, and Jews happily reconcile evolution and their faith, so really ID is only there for fundamentalists who refuse to see the evidence in front of them and continue believing that God is a liar who made a six thousand year-old universe appear to be a 14.5 billion year-old one because he likes to yank our chains.

I understand that fundamentalism is easier because you don't have to think. You just think the way you're told to think and say, "nun-uh" to anything that contradicts what you've been told. But grow up. Deal with facts. Wrestle with your holy books. Test everything, hold on to what is true.

If that leads you from fundie to Lutheran or Methodist or atheist or agnostic humanist, so be it.

A good god doesn't expect you to reject the evidence.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

What you call evidence is, somehow, forgeries planted by Seitan.

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Violet Likes Pretty Flowers's avatar

All Hail Seitan!

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NOGODZ20's avatar

OT

Been gone for 5 hours and haven't had a chance to say this: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ZORGIN!

I even booked the Ramones...

https://youtu.be/0BpMw7gMOsA

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

Thank you!!! 👏👏👏 I was *sniff* beginning *sniff* to wonder if anybody *sniff sniff* remembered. 😭

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Remember what ?

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

That's it, you are out of my will!

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

*Take back the cake ahe sent earlier*

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MalibuMan's avatar

Happy bday my brother

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

Thank you.

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cdbunch's avatar

I'm sure Michael Schoeffling will show up with a cake in a darkened room and make it all better.

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

I would prefer Sara Tomko or Esther Povitsky.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

I should've done it early in the morning. Apologies for being so late.

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Maltnothops's avatar

“ (Parts of this article were published earlier, because Republicans never learn)”

Zing!!

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