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oraxx's avatar

Kenneth Copeland has all the charm of a rotting corpse, and I will never understand why so many people have delegated an important part of their thinking to him. I don't believe in any kind of after life, and even if it exists Copeland doesn't get to decide who goes where. This whole theatrical farce is in keeping with my long held belief that Christianity is made up of roughly equal parts comfort myth and revenge fantasy.

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

"Christianity is made up of roughly equal parts comfort myth and revenge fantasy. "

WOOF! I don't know about Christianity in general, but evangelical? That's cutting right down to the bone, there!

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oraxx's avatar

I stand by my statement. lol

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BlueHarridan's avatar

As well you should! It’s true, and, for the moment anyway, truth is still a defense in this country.

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John Boyd's avatar

The 100% accurate internet meme: 'There is no hate like Christian love' comes to mind.

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Jane in NC's avatar

Is it a coincidence that he looks exactly like The Grinch?

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NOGODZ20's avatar

The Joker under the pancake makeup.

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Crowscage's avatar

That would be Gaetz

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Ethereal fairy Natalie's avatar

So does Matt Gaetz, I suspect it is the eyebrow lift.

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Duke  Stuart's avatar

yes he does...but, THANK the world, THAT ,he doesnt have Karloff's distinctive voice...what an irritating WORM he is...completely insane, of course....

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Zara's avatar

He is like a rotting corpse 🤣 & needs to go to plant food now!

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Ethereal fairy Natalie's avatar

Yep, yet another trying to make the world a worse place, who is long overdue for a dirt-nap.

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HI2thDoc's avatar

Well said.

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John Roberts's avatar

As a Christian evangel nationalist Kenneth Copeland has made a large fortune off his ministry and controlling fear, all tax free. At this time he stands to make a lot more money with the MAGA cult in the United States with no end in sight.

"Tax the churches!" Frank Zappa - 1980

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Ben J's avatar

You simply cannot be fair, can you? It's also a major money making opportunity for grifter, con men, and liars.

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Ethereal fairy Natalie's avatar

Your last line is exactly perfect!

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Joe King's avatar

"... or you didn't pray and vote like I told you to, you ..."

Take away the absurdity of Copeland's punishment fever dream, and you find this at the core. He expects absolute obedience. Not to God, but to 𝘩𝘪𝘮. He tells his followers he has a direct line to his God and therefore they aren't allowed to think for themselves, but must accept Copeland's authority.

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oraxx's avatar

The preachers can talk about their loving Jesus and the glorious after-life from now on, but there is nothing they crave so much as power and control on this earthly plain. Not to mention the wealth that goes with it.

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ericc's avatar

It's fear. They are so afraid of women's rights being a thing that they have to keep punishing supporters of it even after they've won the election.

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XJC's avatar

"Authoritarian tendencies?" It's the New Euphemism for Trump 2025.

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Robot Bender's avatar

"Tendencies?" What an understatement.

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RegularJoe's avatar

What about spontaneous abortions - the vast majority of abortions.....you know, the "babies" that "God" kills directly? Does Kenny get to listen to those names? 🤔

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

He'd probably stick his fingers in his ears and shout, "LALALALALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU!" 😖

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Maltnothops's avatar

No. No. No. Those abortions are part of God's plan .

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Richard Bergman's avatar

As many as one in five pregnancies end in spontaneous abortion, the $God these charletons/televangelists believe-in is against abortion, but is the busiest abortion provider the world has ever known or; alternatively, could SA be an [evolutionary] mechanism so mothers are able to reproduce on another day?

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RegularJoe's avatar

I've seen even higher numbers cited, upwards of 1 in 2. God's will, evidently. Or something.

And yep, it's generally about the money.

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Vanity Unfair's avatar

They are not only the vast majority of abortions but the vast majority of conceptions. As such the aborted zygote would not have a name so the time taken for the naming process would either be zero or an uncomputable period of silence.

I have some reliable references somewhere that I pass on to people who beset me with arguments similar to this. They might be a little out of date now.

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Straw's avatar

Those probably die because the female carrying them are evil. From my stats: At least six pregnancies with at least seven fetuses resultet in only three live kids.

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Holytape's avatar

Just imagine the torture of listening to all those names:

Cayleigh, Caylee, Kaylee, Kayliegh, Kaalee, K-Lee, Kay leigh, Ka'Le', KayLey, Kayleigh Ann, Kayann Lee, Ann Leigh kay, Leighanne Kay, Donald Trump Jr, Kaelee, Kay Lee,......

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Val Uptuous NotAgain's avatar

Let’s suppose that god is only concerned about life on Earth and not the vast expanse of the entire universe. Let’s further assume he’s only interested in human life on Earth. Then we can look at the 8 billion plus people living on the Earth currently, add in the billions of people who have lived and died throughout history and prehistory, and we see that God is mad that about a quarter of 300 million or so people living in the USA that can vote (I’m not doing the precise math, but I’m betting it’s even fewer than that) that didn’t vote for Trump. And if there are only 65 million (+/-) aborted zefs, considering the numbers I mentioned, that’s pretty good survival rates.

Besides, any god that thinks Trump is worth punishing those that didn’t vote for him over, isn’t a god worth his salt or my attention.

Thank you Hemant for bringing up the women who die from the abortion bans and the LGBTQ people who die from the intolerance pushed by the right and the rest. Very good points all around.

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HI2thDoc's avatar

Math and logic are not in the evangelical wheelhouse

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Straw's avatar

I've never voted for Trump and will never, luckily, be able to. Do I get punished?

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HI2thDoc's avatar

Paraphrasing: If hating Trump is wrong, I don't wanna be right

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

Okay, I'll bite. WHY, for the love of Pete, does ANYONE listen to Kenneth Copeland anymore? Yeah, yeah, I know, they've been indoctrinated up the wazoo, they've bought into the bullshit, given up any semblance of skepticism or independent thinking, et cetera, et cetera ... but THIS? COME ON!

I dunno. I'm just tired of the bilious crap that comes out of evangelical Christianity and the fact that the followers of people like Copeland might as well be sheep, for their utter lack of thought.

And that's all I've got for now.

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Straw's avatar

Luckily we don't have many loud preacher's like that. One is still way too many.

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

Norway may not, but the US has a surfeit of them, and as you well know, they get documented in Hemant's blogs and too many other venues to count. The level of stupidity and blind ignorance, represented by Copeland and others like him is positively staggering.

And now, to borrow from Yates, "the blood-dimmed tide is loosed."

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Straw's avatar

I know, I was shocked the first time I visited US, in Dec. 2011 I think it was. I was not prepared for that.

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xenubarb's avatar

Norway is sounding better... except for the language thing. Yeah, I can learn Norwegian, but I'd need subtitles for six months or so. I don't mind snow, or ice giants. But Norwegian isn't a romance-based language so I'd be starting all over.

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Straw's avatar

Most Norwegians understand and talk English quite well. Lot of us would gladly help you learning Norwegian.

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Donrox's avatar

You could do it! Norwegian is a Germanic language, and you are obviously exceedingly proficient at English. It would be another issue if we were talking about Finnish.

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

You are NOT alone, my friend.

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HI2thDoc's avatar

We need a new moniker for these gullible idiots. Calling them sheep seems insulting to actual sheep

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Sheeple is a classic.

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Crowscage's avatar

christains

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Ethereal fairy Natalie's avatar

Not if you have ever owned sheep. They are very stupid animals.

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HI2thDoc's avatar

Sheep or MAGAs?

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Ethereal fairy Natalie's avatar

I never wanted to own a magat!

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Is there a difference? ;)

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Maltnothops's avatar

Christidiot. Doesn't quite roll off the tongue.

Accent on the second syllable.

chri-STID-ee-ot.

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HI2thDoc's avatar

Descriptive, tho

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Ethereal fairy Natalie's avatar

They don't call them a 'flock" for nothing. They are sheep. No thinking person could believe that crap.

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Munchygut's avatar

Bilious, I like bilious...

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Kiwiwriter47's avatar

My answer to him is that he will spend eternity listening to the names of every single person brutally tortured and murdered by devout Christians from the Crusades to the present.

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Straw's avatar

I can like that.

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Crowscage's avatar

That's wacking material for these ghouls.

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painedumonde's avatar

A very very very niche demographic to be sure.

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John Roberts's avatar

I remember the Billy Graham Crusades on TV back in the 1960 and early 70's. Forced to watch them as a child by my parents if going to church three times a week wasn't enough. IMO he and a few other TV Christian ministers are and were instrumental in what's going on today in the United States with the Christian nationalist and MAGA cult.

Good luck to everyone apposed to the right wing religious dogma and fear.

Freedom of religion is also freedom from religion, thanks.

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Kiwiwriter47's avatar

One of the many annoying things about Billy Graham was that he was an anti-Semite.

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Charles Newman's avatar

Agreed, an he had the US presidents ear at that time. He was a big supporter of the Vietnam war, fighting the spread of Godless Communists. Researching his life, he and his family made became wealthy because of his religious beliefs. Today some of his offspring are as disgusting if not more. The son and daughter are over the top sponging off the the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association all tax free, spreading the word of Christ. IMO scary people.

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Kiwiwriter47's avatar

Yeah, I’m not a big fan of Billy Graham.

He is an interesting counterpoint to the common view of the 1960s of the rise of the counter-culture…during the 1960s, his outreach peaked in terms of attendance at his events.

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HI2thDoc's avatar

Excellent!

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Hank Long's avatar

50% Lying Charlatan + 50% Evil Asshole = Kenny Can't-Copeland

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

Honestly, I think it's more like 100% of both. One parameter doesn't necessarily obviate the other in this case.

More's the pity.

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Joe King's avatar

Isn't "lying charlatan" just a subset of "evil asshole"?

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

I think the Venn Diagram on that one is damned near circular.

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Lynn Veit's avatar

Possibly. Evil asshole is a subset of lying charlatan.

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Duke  Stuart's avatar

ha ha ha

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Red Lizard's avatar

Does that creature understand how many abortions his God performs around the world on an annual basis? 23 million.

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

They can't be bothered to notice, especially considering that 1) their god doesn't make mistakes and 2) if their god DOES make mistakes, see 1) above. That doesn't change the fact that, as I've stated multiple times, comparing the number of safe, antiseptic, legal abortions with the number of failed egg implants and miscarriages in the history of homo sapiens would look like a side-by of a water droplet and the Pacific Ocean.

There's also the fact that Copeland and his sheep don't like facts.

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ericc's avatar

The afterlife is a 'death, or ugu' joke.

The poor sods in Hell will be tortured by having to listen to fallen angels reel out the names of all the aborted babies. In contrast, the saved in Heaven get the glorious rapture of hearing angels sing the names of all the children the Lord blessed with heaven before they could be born into a life of sin and misery.

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Donrox's avatar

It might be preferrable to having to sing "Our god is an awesome god" to a vain deity for eternity.

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Lynn Veit's avatar

I avoid church and religious gatherings like the plague, and I still know that stupid song. That's prevalent it is.

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Ethereal fairy Natalie's avatar

You could have stopped at word four, he understands nothing!

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NOGODZ20's avatar

"Jesus stood there and he said, 'Those of you who didn't vote, I put you in that nation and you didn't vote...or you didn't vote the way I told you..."

Stop right there. I wasn't aware that voting was a thing in Jesus' time. HE certainly didn't vote. And isn't him telling people how to vote foreign election interference?

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cdbunch's avatar

He needs to speak louder. I didn't hear Jesus tell me how to vote. Just a lot of deluded or hateful or both people.

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Guerillasurgeon's avatar

Well, if I could stand in for BHM here – voting was sort of a thing in the Roman Republic and even in the Empire, although it meant very little by then. I'm pretty sure it was unheard of in Judea though. And I'm pretty sure Ken isn't very keen on it.

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Bob Riggins's avatar

Nobody votes in the bible.

Ever.

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Lynn Veit's avatar

Isn't he a foreign national anyway? Or am I conflating him with someone else?

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Psittacus Ebrius's avatar

Copeland is too much of an imbecile to realize that Jesus did not recognize any government. An inconvenience he leaves out of his sermons to his enlightened followers.

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Cathy G's avatar

The thought of being in heaven for eternity with the likes of Copeland sounds a lot like hell.

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Ethereal fairy Natalie's avatar

oh yeah.

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Micheal's avatar

I don't believe in demons or demonic possession, but, when I look at this guy's eyes, he looks possessed. He's a goddamned freak show. I know a guy that follows him religiously (see what I did there?) He spouts off every teaching that Copeland has presented. He's just as bat-shit as Copeland.

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Brent Abrahamson's avatar

Hell would be spending eternity with these fuckers. Copeland learned well from his mentor Oral Robert’s. Oral. That’s how Copeland passes his seeds of wisdom on to his cult of believers. He’s secretly enjoyed this little tingle for decades.

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Ethereal fairy Natalie's avatar

👆👆👆👆👆👆👆👆👆👆👆👆🎯

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Jane in NC's avatar

Christians like Copeland aren't longing for judgment day or the rapture or whatever woo they believe in because of their great love and longing to see their Jesus. Oh, hell no! It's because they can't wait to see all 'em godless atheists get what's comin' to 'em. Most would gladly forego spending eternity in heaven for one minute's pleasure of watching the heathen suffer. The Religion of Love™️ never misses a chance to wish evil on others.

My only surprise was learning that Kenneth Copeland is still alive.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

They also aren't longing for that afterlife because it means an end to the $$$ they rake in from their mindess followers. Money's the god they truly love and serve.

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Jane in NC's avatar

They don't want to die coz they know their Jesus will be a bit tetchy about how many Mee Maws they scammed out of their social security checks.

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Ethereal fairy Natalie's avatar

Yup, they worship Mammon, not the J-dude.

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wreck's avatar

"I saw this in the spirit. Literally,"

Words. How the fuck do they work?

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Joe King's avatar

"I saw this in the spirit" is christianese for "I made this shit up and I want you to believe it's real".

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Wm Dawg's avatar

Copeland is a grifter of enormous proportions. Arrogantly. Unapologetically , Acting / speaking at times in public the part of a spiritual guide while grifting a gullible , desperate, needy base. While all the while actually being whole heartedly the very embodiment of that which Jesus is said to have warned his followers about. He is purported to have said specifically that after his death false teachers will arise saying they are speaking in the authority of the christ but they are a “wolf in a sheep’s clothing “. ‘You will know them by their deeds.

If one reads the “new testament” one quickly sees the disparity between Copland, (J.Falwell , Jim Baker and all such as those like them ) and those people who sincerely follow the teachings of the man they called the christ. There does not need to be a god in heaven to find value in following the teachings of a person of peace, unity, inclusion, kindness and forgiveness.

Tax the churches. Temper the enormous grift.

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

Took the words right outta my fingers! 😁

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xenubarb's avatar

Just like, "I talked to god last night, and he said...."

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cdbunch's avatar

"I talked to God. She says, "Yo, what's up?" And she wants you to lose the gun" - 'Empire Records'

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Dianne Marie Leonard's avatar

Yeah. Literally. I do not think that word means what he thinks it means. (And I'm so fucking tired of hearing people use "literally" in every sentence!)

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ericc's avatar

I get this vision of Copeland watching Ferris Bueller's Day Off while on acid, the classroom scene comes on, and snap! He gets this idea for hell.

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Zizzer-Zazzer-Zuzz's avatar

He saw it while drinking?

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

Typical. Misogynistic Georgia officials don't like the findings of the committee. So? THROW OUT THE COMMITTEE!

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Matri's avatar

“How dare you provide proof of our incompetence?!”

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

Ummm ... I like facts? 😁

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Kay-El's avatar

I think Texas did something similar. If you don’t report, it doesn’t exist. 🙄

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

That was also Trump's attitude toward COVID. If you don't report the numbers, you don't look as bad! 😝

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Kay-El's avatar

Right?! “Stay on the boat people, so our numbers don’t go up”. 🙄🙄🙄

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Len Koz's avatar

Yet the morons voted him in. Again.

https://www.reactiongifs.com/quadruple-facepalm/

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Ethereal fairy Natalie's avatar

Thanks to his youngest, the Nazi youth Baron who told him to go on all the Incel podcasts.

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Len Koz's avatar

The Incels weren't the only ones who proved their own stupidity.

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cdbunch's avatar

Close my eyes. If I can't see you, you can't see me.

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Val Uptuous NotAgain's avatar

They really hate women.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Georgia. They're so "pro-life." :S

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cdbunch's avatar

You can't make me donate blood, but you can make a woman risk her life carrying a "baby" she doesn't want because... she had sex. Even if it was with her husband.

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