460 Comments

Will there also be a video showing how that sperm got from the man into the woman?

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Yeah, it's called "Sorority Row Vixens."

It won a "Woody" at the porno movie awards.

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'Tis passing strange, there is no page for that at the Internet Adult Film Database. πŸ€”

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🀣

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God did it. /s

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Feb 29
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In the missionary position, to boot.

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Through a hole in the sheet, I'm sure.

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If you're using a boot, it's mot missionary. : )

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If you're wearing boots, it's S&M in the missionary position. πŸ˜‰

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Hey, don't knock the missionary position.

It's tried and true.

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Not when you are called John Allen Chau.

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I seem to have missed a name here...

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Idiot who tried to evangelize on North Sentinel island and well, the inhabitants are know to be extremely hostile to outsiders, sufficiently so, that the island is quarantined.

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But soooooo vanilla and heterosexual Christian.

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Yes, but you don't have to be vanilla or Christian to enjoy that position.

How about a Jewish guy bopping a black girl in the missionary position?

A good time definitely had by both...

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No vocalizing. And the woman has to stay still.

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Sex in the trunk? That's even more uncomfortable than the backseat of a Volkswagen.

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First open the backseat door to engage the dome light, then camera and ACTION!

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"Dear Abby, dear Abby

Well I never thought

That me and my girlfriend would ever get caught

We were sitting in the back seat just shooting the breeze

With her hair up in curlers and her pants to her knees

Signed just married"

-John Prine

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LJVFY_LX9Ik

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I got to say it: this lying sack of shit is an embarrassment not just to our government, but to the millions of American citizens who would hear what he said about conception and evolution and would either convulse with laughter or facepalm themselves red. I read Azinger's words and all I can sense is mad desperation, a desperation borne possibly of his awareness that his brand of Christianity is losing traction in the US and is being replaced by reason and secularism and garden-variety common sense ... except obviously in the state of West Virginia, where that misguided bill passed by a wide margin

[He shakes his head and groans] Honestly, it's too early in the day for me to be reaching for the Glenlivet

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We have long left facepalms behind and are right into headdesk territory.

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We may have moved beyond headdesk and on to running full tilt into a brick wall.

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No thank you, I've already had too many concussions.

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I'm not sure the wall is brick. I think it's foot-thick steel.

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Beat me to it. I started headdesking around college students with this level of ignorance when I was a bio grad student and teaching assistant in the mid-80s. (The term "headdesk" hadn't been invented yet..)

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Dunno. Never too early these days.

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Glenlivet....the good stuff.

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True ... but there's also MacAllan. The REALLY good stuff! πŸ˜‹

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Yes, it is.

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My reaction to what he said was ROTLMAO.

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His official bio says the following about his education: B.S., Masters of Pastoral Theology. The B.S. is clearly not Bachelors of SCIENCE. Or English. Amd pastoral theology? He misreads the Torah!

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The people who attack evolution never seem to grasp the fact they have an obligation to prove their own point, and that simply attacking Darwin doesn't do that. They simply assume they win by default if evolution can be discredited. Creationists have been flailing away at poor old Darwin for over a century and half, and have yet to land a punch. Meanwhile, science just keeps reinforcing natural selection. It disgusts me that we're still having this discussion. Religion is about belief. Science is about facts and what is testable.

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Their own logic is argument from authority, so they assume science is argument from authority too. They don't get that scientists will happily discuss all the ways Darwin was wrong...while still wholeheartedly recognizing evolution.

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If logic were their strong point, they probably wouldn't be attacking evolution using religion; attempting to use a nonsensical argument to 'logically' prove a point would be pretty much the height of cognitive dissonance.

Then again, there do always seem to be these outliers that pop up, don't there?

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Honestly, could these men know LESS about reproduction in human animals?

Remember in 2012 when they talked about how women's bodies could just "get rid" of that impregnated egg if she was raped?

"A woman's body has a way to shut that whole thing down".

No, you moron, we don't. That's why there have been 64,000 forced births resulting from rape in abortion ban states since 2022.

White women need to start voting like their lives depend on it, because for some of us, it is true.

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They’re the incels on dating sites asking if the clit is tight. Or saying periods come out our butts, and we pee and sex through the same hole. I read something from a woman who worked for some national politician (rep or senator, not sure which) who thought we can just hold our periods and didn’t understand that we need to do something to absorb the blood right away. He thought it was just an excuse for women to get more bathroom breaks. But the sheer number of men who don’t get that we can’t just hold our periods like we hold our pee, or even that our diet causes us to have a period. Like, it affects our periods but we don’t bleed because we aren’t supposed to eat meat like our ancestors, the women who foraged for nuts and berries, not the big manly men who hunted. The ignorance of some folks is breathtaking and the fact that they want to spread it to others is sickening.

I posted on a group about men’s misbehavior a meme about an obstetrician who was lamenting how ignorant even their patients are regarding the connection between sex and pregnancy, noting that they have 14 year old patients. The spread of this type of misinformation and ignorance does not protect children from pregnancy or harm, it only makes them more likely targets for abuse and victimization.

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I'll admit I don't know much about female specific anatomy*, but I do know most women would gladly stop their periods if they could.

*I've had no need, or I would have fucking looked it up.

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The only benefit to going through the hell of menopause is no more menstrual cycles.

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Amen sista

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Yep. And I still don't believe it was worth it.

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Oh come on, those mood swings are stimulating! And having to get up in the middle of the night because you're soaked with sweat and you need to change is good if you're having bad dreams, right? And hot flashes are a treat, don't forget those.

And the most fun I had was going on birth control for 18 months at age 55 (the women here will understand) and gaining 20 pounds!

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I can hear your sarcastical voice there.

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Sigh. I'm sorry.

People in general often lack empathy for experiences they can't translate into something personal. But hell, just *basic education* - no empathy required - should have been enough to get those idiots beyond the callousness you're talking about.

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That is one of the defects of the conservative brain and why they are so tribal.

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Or the utter clown who wondered why women couldn't swallow little cameras to see what their uteri were up to...

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In all the stupidity, I had forgotten that gem.

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I am sure there is some who don't know in which hole to stick* it.

* My orthographic corrector has humor, he replaced "stick" by "dick" 🀣

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Now dick it

Into shape

Shape it up

Get straight

Go forward

Move ahead

Try to detect it

It's not too late

To dick it

Dick it good

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Dick it WELL!

Sheeesh, whatever happened to good grammar?

;-)

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Dick. It's good!

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Filthy minded autocorrect.

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Fitting, I guess.

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"West Virginia is currently ranked 47th in the nation when it comes to education."

I don't need magic powers to predict they will soon be 50th.

The future of theses children is dire, not only they will have a subpar uneducation, but they will have troubles to have a valuable diploma and find a good paying job later.

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Mississippi will never give up being 50th.

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Didn't they buy the rights to being 50th? Sure feels like it.

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Mississippi has proudly held that title for centuries.

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New Mexico is dead last. Mississippi is 41st.

*does doubletake*

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So now we're having an argument about the color of the dog who produced the shit that's on the bottom of our shoes?

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Big and Red.

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Clifford?

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Let's just say he's a canine of interest in the investigation.

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One?

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Neither caramel or chocolate.

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That's weird.

Must have something to do with the historic mistreatment of New Mexico's large Native American community.

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Keep in mind: The ranking for NM being 50th is just based on Education and not the state's overall ranking. That 'honor' goes to Louisiana. They've been ranked 50th Overall for years.

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Louisiana makes more sense.

Thank you, Huey Long, Leander Perez, Eddie Edwards, and David Duke.

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The difference between the states holding the worst spots is minuscule.

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Ra la la. 51th then, happy now ?

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Well, Luxembourg is next to go

And who knows, maybe Monaco...

-- Tom Lehrer.

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🎡We'll try to stay serene and calm...when Alabama gets the bomb🎡

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Greatest political satirist ever...

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He's 95 now. When he goes, I shall weep unashamedly.

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I really don't think these Republicans care about the children being appropriately educated. I'm convinced that their main priority is completely self-serving and their intent is to raise a generation of kids who'll become predominantly ultra right wing voters to counter the naturally increasing progressivism they see in each new generation. They know that their political power and influence is doomed otherwise. The most effective way to manipulate and control someone is to lie to them, gaslight them, and keep them willfully ignorant. Add onto that, the fact that most of these Republicans actually believe their own lies, and you end up with an incredibly toxic group of people who are relentless in pursuing their agenda at the expense of others' wellbeing. It's the same mindset and tactics narcissistic abusers use.

And listen to the prolific amount of projection that right wingers engage in: All of the accusations of indoctrination of children, censorship, persecution, and claims that Democrats are a danger to kids and have some grand scheme to brainwash them against their will to embrace liberal values like tolerance, equality, diversity, science, etc. They're revealing exactly what their own motivations and goals are by projecting them onto the opposition. Everyone needs to pay attention and take it seriously.

I'm really heartbroken for these poor kids. I know exactly what it's to be lied to and manipulated as a child by the adults you're supposed to trust and who you assume have your best interests at heart. It f**ks you up for life and one is very fortunate to ever completely break free from it. Now I watch this happening on such a grand scale and I can't help but take it personally.

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The Republicans' War On Education is intentional.

The dumber they can make the public, the easier they'll swallow whatever bullshit the Repubs feed them, the more likely they'll vote Republican.

And thus their megalomaniacal grip on power is preserved.

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Plus, ignorant people make better wage slaves.

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Especially those conditioned to never question their β€œbetters”.

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FWIW, there seem to be about 15 states in the bottom 5 when it comes to education. Schroedinger’s Morons.

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With Ryan Walters in Oklahoma? I think he can drive them further, especially since he seems thrilled with the murder of non-conformist students.

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β€œAny Jew who believes the first five books of the Bible would, by definition, believe that life begins at conceptionβ€œ

I won’t say that no Jewish people believe in the first five books of the Bible, but the first five books of the Bible are not the same as the book the Jewish religion is based on. It was taken from the Talmud, but it has been bastardized by and for Christians. Don’t tell other people what they believe or think, idiot.

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Christian Torahsplainin' to Jews. You knew it was eventually going to happen...and you knew it would be a right-wing evangelical who did it.

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And I knew they’d be completely wrong.

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What, do you believe there ever was a possibility they could be correct. About anything?

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When they say overtly they want a theocracy

See majorly traitor green case.

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It's like the old lawyer joke about lying: how do you know when they're wrong? Their mouths are open.

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But Republican lawmakers are experts on everything. Women, Gender Identity, sexual orientation, evolution, gestation, and the practice of medicine in general. Don't you know it's a requirement to have an M.D. or Ph.D. in biology/science to run for office as a Republican?

/s in case any newbie needs it.

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Mr Azinger:

Life begins at conception, huh? Does that mean Adam and Eve were never alive, since they were manufactured instead of being conceived? A sperm cell and an egg cell aren't alive? I think you need to go back to school to learn the basics of biology and Christian theology.

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Can you imagine being one of this guy's constituents who actually understands how completely out of touch with reality he is, and there's not a damn thing you can do about it?

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The bible clearly states that life begins with the first breath.

Genesis 2:7 (KJV)

"And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘Žπ‘‘β„Ž π‘œπ‘“ 𝑙𝑖𝑓𝑒; π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘ π‘šπ‘Žπ‘› π‘π‘’π‘π‘Žπ‘šπ‘’ π‘Ž 𝑙𝑖𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔 π‘ π‘œπ‘’π‘™."

Ezekiel 37:6 (KJV)

"And I will lay sinews upon you, and will bring up flesh upon you, and cover you with skin, π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘ 𝑝𝑒𝑑 π‘π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘Žπ‘‘β„Ž 𝑖𝑛 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’, π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘ 𝑦𝑒 π‘ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘™π‘™ 𝑙𝑖𝑣𝑒; and ye shall know that I am the Lord."

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Saying he need to coming back to school is assuming he went a first time.

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Feb 29
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I'm just dead on the inside.

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T'as besoin d'une bière ?

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No, I'm good, but thanks for asking.

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My kid LOVED "All My Friends are Dead" when he was 8-9. It's still on his bookshelf, years later.

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That's a stiff proposition....

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Light at the end of the tunnel: Some West Virginians tell a joke about the hillbilly who died smiling.

"What'd he die of?" the man's relatives asked the medical examiner. "He was struck by lightning," the medical examiner declared.

"Then why was he smiling?" the kinfolks wanted to know.

"Well," the ME said, "he thought he was gettin' his picture took."

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"Meet my sister, also my wife...."

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How biblical.

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The evangelists don't talk about that much, though.

Because of their inbreeding, I guess.

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Yeah, the Bible's full of God's unholy violence....

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Are Lot's daughters' children sibling or cousins ? Discuss.

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That would be like discussing whether my brother is brother or cousin once removed. (Tremenning in Norwegian). He is both.

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Behold. The Imminent Demise of Evolution: The Longest Running Falsehood in Creationism. The article that lists a whole slew of made up, unfounded lies about evolution being a dying trend dating all the way back to the mid-1800s' and still being told by modern day creation idiots like this clown in Office.

https://thewordofme.wordpress.com/2010/04/03/the-imminent-demise-of-evolution-the-longest-running-falsehood-in-creationism/

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Yeah. Just saw a critique yesterday of a video with another creationist yapping about the "dying theory of evolution". It's the whole thing about the Big Lie and ignorance all over again. (These people also have no idea what a theory is.)

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Oh excellent, exactly the sort of thing I was looking for above. Thanks!

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Sometimes, I get the strangest ideas. Like today, today's idea was writing horrifically awful fanfiction on Baby Olivia and seeing how long it takes to circulate among the religious right. You know, some story about how Olivia's mother was stoned to death just hours after her birth for being raped and not screaming loudly enough, and how now Olivia should belong to her mother's rapist, who hasn't been found, so her mother's brother owns her. Later on, Olivia gets sold to a man who beats her and uses her, and then gets pregnant herself, and dies hours after the birth of her child because...you guessed it, she got raped and didn't scream loudly enough.

TLDR: There are some π’—π’†π’“π’š π’ˆπ’π’π’… 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒔 we don't follow Old Testament/Jewish law traditions anymore, and I'm really sick of lawmakers behaving as though Jewish traditional law was the absolute peak of human legal code. It wasn't in a number of ways, and one would think after several thousand years, we'd have learned to do better.

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There's passive ignorance, where you just never heard some information, there's negligent ignorance, where you could get the information but you just can't be bothered, and then there's active ignorance, where you work hard to avoid the information, deliberately misrepresent it, and tell lies about the information, its source, and the people who actually know and understand it. Your ignorance is based on fear, and your fear is based on ignorance. You also work hard to spread your disinformation to as many people as you can, since you only feel safe from the information if you're surrounded by folks who are ignorant in the same way that you are.

Mr. Azinger has a black belt in active ignorance, and the chance of any of the information that strikes terror in his heart ever getting into his mind is close to zero.

Civilization drags a stone called religion chained to its ankle.

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