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Zizzer-Zazzer-Zuzz's avatar

"A number of years ago, our board of directors started asking, “What happens when the bus hits Ken?”…"

Party time? Who has the keys?

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David Graf's avatar

Given Ham's museum, I would suggest that a more appropriate question would be "What happens when Ken drowns in a flood?".

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oraxx's avatar

I'd love to see them test the Ark's sea worthiness.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

The ark of the bible wasn't seaworthy. It would've fallen to pieces.

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

And once again, I must bring up the Schooner Wyoming and what happened to IT ... keeping in mind that it was a LOT smaller than the ark!

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Zizzer-Zazzer-Zuzz's avatar

The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down

Of the big lake they called Gitche Gumee

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RegularJoe's avatar

And that was a rather superior comment...really quite Great, I Du-luth declare.

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RegularJoe's avatar

But the Ark was such a Titanic vessel......

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Bill Wilson's avatar

The Ark is the floater in the toilet bowl of myths.

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jomicur's avatar

So God is the Ty-D-Bol man?

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Bill Wilson's avatar

Or woman.

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Bill Wilson's avatar

Or is hit by a boat and dies.

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cdbunch's avatar

You want to give the bus driver the key to the city? Ok.

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oraxx's avatar

Ken Ham is a religious nut case who built a monument to human ignorance with money donated by people too stupid to know any better. It only stands to reason his heir apparent would be someone equally crazy and intolerant. I wonder if either of these two grasp the irony involved when a science denier uses a smart phone?

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NOGODZ20's avatar

He got taxpayer $$$ to build his personal religious fantasy while simultaneously practicing discrimination in his hiring policies. That's not supposed to happen.

They did try to keep tax money away from him. He bitched and moaned and stamped his feet until he got his way. Christian persecution in America, my ass.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Or a plane. He should have gone from Australia to US on foot.

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cdbunch's avatar

No. He should have built an ark and floated to the U.S.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Waste of perfectly good trees.

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cdbunch's avatar

Their sacrifice would be greatly appreciated when he floated onto the shores of the North Sentinel Island.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Where he'd face an 'arrowing experience.

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Anri's avatar

Or gophers.

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Joan the Dork's avatar

Wearing a nice set of super-durable concrete galoshes.

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XJC's avatar

Who needs AI when we have Trump, Ken Ham and God calling all the shots?

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Joan the Dork's avatar

I'd sooner trust ChatGPT to call the shots than Chump, SHam, or a fictional god.

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Richard Wade's avatar

Great! A younger, more dynamic, more PARANOID and more demagogic leader than Ken Ham will accelerate the full-throttle power dive into the ground that the world-wide Religion of Hate is committed to complete.

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Daniel Rotter's avatar

Way off-topic, but to all my fellow Southern Californians reading this, be safe.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

A hurricane in Southern California. Oh, but climate change is a hoax.

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Lynn James's avatar

Course it's a hoax! Gawd is sending this hurricane because he is PISSED that California is still blue and still refuses to stone women who have abortions.

Dint y'all's mamma teach y'all nuthin?

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Joan the Dork's avatar

I assumed that if a hurricane was hitting California it must've been because of something Alabama did, for a change.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Maybe he finally decided to stop crushing trailer parks in the bible belt. Beating on porn addicted yokels all the time loses its flavor after a while.

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Joan the Dork's avatar

But we all know how bad Gawd's aim is... the culprit must be in the babble belt, surely?

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Lynn James's avatar

Hmmmmm...well, what with California being woke and all (that shit really pisses him off bigly), and Alabama so opposite of woke it might as well be dead...even somebody with bad aim could accidentally hit the target once in a while.

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Lynn James's avatar

🤣

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Mr.E's avatar

it gets hot in the summer and cold in the winter. Seriously want to slap people who make that stupid argument.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Hot fall*, cold spring*, summer, spring, summer That's the cycle we had in about one year.

* Interchangeable.

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larry parker's avatar

We're due to break the record high* for August 3 days next week.

*96F = 35.5C

Tues, Wen and Thur are forecasted for over 100F (37.8C).

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Iowow!

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larry parker's avatar

Iowooooe.

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cdbunch's avatar

I suspect Fox will have a field day with the name as well if they aren't already. My sister's out there. She's supposed to fly here in the morning, we're wondering if she'll make it.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Fox must have really short memories. We can fire right back and remind them of Hurricane Don back in late July.

There have also been not one but two tropical storms named Don, one in 2011 and one in 2017.

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jomicur's avatar

OT: A court in Louisiana(!) has just handed the Catholic church a HUGE loss:

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2023/aug/19/louisiana-court-catholic-abuse-victims-ruling

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

Hell of it is, they should to the exact same thing for charges of gross sexual imposition (particularly of a minor!) and all degrees of rape. I say this because I am frankly tired of seeing priests continue to go free, even with the monetary penalties that their dioceses incur.

Some of these fuckers just flat need to be JAILED!

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Tiny 🎻 time.

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Bill Wilson's avatar

Thank you for sharing this news article.

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jomicur's avatar

My pleasure.

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jomicur's avatar

" there is no way you can expunge that message and that truth because it is the Gospel"

Huh? I just took the time to check my Bible, and I'm damned if I can find any reference to conversion therapy in the Gospels. Or to sexual orientation in any context at all. It isn't possible the "omniscient" God didn't know anything about it, is it?

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Joan the Dork's avatar

Of course not- there's nothing Gawd didn't know! Just look at all the useful things he had to say about computer science, cataract surgery, and aerospace engineering!

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larry parker's avatar

Computer science - 1+1+1=1

Cataract surgery - pluck your own eye out.

Aerospace engineering - Watch out for the dome.

Checkmate!!!

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Not to mention other planets, galaxies, nebulas, black holes, quasars, pulsars, dark matter...

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Joan the Dork's avatar

I think you mean heresy, heresy, heresy, heresy, heresy, heresy, and heresy!

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jomicur's avatar

Planets? Many religious Greeks, Babylonians and Egyptians believed that those "wandering stars" were quite literally the souls of various gods and goddesses. Why would Yahweh want to give equal time to his rivals? You know, sort of like Trump skipping the GOP debate to do a dog-and-pony act with Tucker Carlson.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Hey, Donnie: We already know you can't debate. We've seen you in action in two different Presidential campaigns.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Please leave Aria out of it 😁

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cdbunch's avatar

1st rule of cataract surgery, don't let them tempt you with visions of not needing glasses. It's more trouble than it's worth to have corrected lens put in. You still end up needing reading glasses. It's easier to just stick with your current glasses.

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OwossoHarpist's avatar

Gospel according to Dumb Idiot Ham = young earth fantasy with a touch of toxic Bible reading made up of proof texting, fragmented verses, adding words to it that was never there to begin with, rely only on the King James Version while ignoring other versions, etc.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

"The Truth of It."

This from a guy who deals in falsehoods.

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Daniel Rotter's avatar

Hey, don't knock it. As a big Stephen King fan, I welcome discussions about "truths" in his books. *smiles*

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Maltnothops's avatar

I used to work in an environment where a lot of opinions were prefaced with “The fact of the matter is….” As I was a junior employee, I restricted my responses to eyerolls. Got caught once and was reprimanded for it.

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Old Man Shadow's avatar

Remember every accusation from these people is either projection or a confession.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Folau fundraiser allegedly 2 millions, donated 100 000. They can give drumpster grift lessons.

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Maltnothops's avatar

Exactly what jumped out at me.

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larry parker's avatar

5% - That's looks a little high for Trump.

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Whitney's avatar

I saw that, read it over again, and assumed I was losing my mind or there was some sort of error.

Epic grift there, yep.

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Joan the Dork's avatar

Meet the new grifter, same as the old grifter.

Seriously, though, Australia... don't you have some far corner of nowhere to send these nitwits to instead of shipping them here? Somewhere full of giant spiders and snakes and crocodiles? We're kinda full up on wingnut whackjobs already, y'know. You really don't need to send us any more.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

There are 10 deserts in Australia. Let the loonies all go walkabout in them.

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jomicur's avatar

They can preach their damnfool gospel to the totally not-evolved dingoes and platypuses.

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Daniel Rotter's avatar

"Walkabout on by"

-Dionne Warwick

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

You have swamps and alligators.

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Joan the Dork's avatar

...and we've already got enough home-grown crazy to feed all of them, thankyouverymuch.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

You should always spoil your pets.

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cdbunch's avatar

What do you want to go poisoning alligators for?

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larry parker's avatar

It's at least a 12 hour drive to the nearest wild alligator. : )

Edit: Probably only 10 hours. They range further north than I thought.

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

We have crocs too, not just the ones you wear on your feet.

https://myfwc.com/wildlifehabitats/profiles/reptiles/american-crocodile/

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NOGODZ20's avatar

I'm sure some inventive scamp has designed a pair of Crocs that look like crocs.

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Guerillasurgeon's avatar

"some far corner of nowhere"

For christ's sake ... we don't wan' 'em!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Payback for Ray Comfort. C'mon, take it like a man.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Once again:

The Ark Encounter is supposed to be a Christian ministry. What does this Old Testament graven image (along with the Creation Museum an hour to the north) have to do with Jesus?

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OwossoHarpist's avatar

Nothing. It's all to forcefully promote Creation Fantasy as allegedly told in Genesis 1-11 which they forcefully and falsely parade around as "The Ultimate Biblical truth." Besides, most of the time the idiots make Jesus take the farthest back seat of the bus while they preach about Adam, the Fall, Noah, the Flood, the Tower of Babel, Evolution being a lie, etc. only to bring up Jesus dying on the cross, rising the the dead, coming back to judge the world with fire, and then, last but not least, engage in Christian proselytizing all for only just a few moments before putting Christ back into the back of the bus again and forget about him for the rest of their presentation.

Notice there is a complete lack of crucifixes seen plastered in front of all of Dumb Idiot Ham's putrid attractions unlike all those inaccurate, outdated dinosaur models he has dotting every part of his "museum" and some areas of his "ark park" which serves as a home to his unrealistic Noah's ark built in shape of a large modern day oil tanker.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

They can't even get out Genesis before contradicting their own creation myth (Genesis 1 vs Genesis 2).

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jomicur's avatar

Not to mention the half dozen other creation myths, whole or partial, that are scattered through the old testament. And none of them agree with Genesis. (That's one of the numerous "no contradictions" found in the bible.)

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

Considering that the entire book of Genesis may have had FOUR authors, the reason for the discontinuity is obvious.

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Zizzer-Zazzer-Zuzz's avatar

Three are the authors thou shall count, and the counting of the authors shall be three.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

"Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out."

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jomicur's avatar

I know a lot more than five people who are out.

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OwossoHarpist's avatar

Dumb Idiot Ham claims (without evidence) that Seth, the third son of Adam wrote the first few chapters of Genesis while the other chapters involving the Flood and the Tower of Babel were written by one of the sons of Noah years later. Then Moses took all of what has been written and combine them all to form the Book of Genesis as written in the King James Version. But not one archaeological, historical, or Biblical source has ever been found to confirmed this.

So obviously, Dumb Idiot Ham and his cronies just made the whole thing up, like the rest of their ridiculous, farfetched claims.

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Zizzer-Zazzer-Zuzz's avatar

I wonder if that's how he tries to get around the different writing styles or whatever the other differences between the sources are.

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jomicur's avatar

Actually, my cat Mandy wrote Genesis. Anyway, if she had it would make a lot more sense.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Yet at the same time it's supposed to be the inerrant word of God. 🐽

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

Check me on this, but I believe Genesis 1 and Genesis 2 have two different authors all by themselves. Talk about needing an editor!

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Allegedly, the fictional Moses wrote all of Genesis. Maybe he was still reeling from breathing in the hallucinogenic fumes from a burning acacia bush/tree.

Every source I looked up to try to find that actual authors of Genesis1 and 2 was Christian. Not real reliable.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

It's Sathenists's fault.

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

Uh-huh ... SUUUUUURE it is. 😝

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NOGODZ20's avatar

As one bible warning label said...

WARNING: THIS BOOK IS A WORK OF FICTION AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE FOLLOWED AS A SOURCE OF MORALITY. OF COURSE NOBODY COULD REALLY BE STUPID ENOUGH TO TAKE THIS BOOK LITERALLY....RIGHT?

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XJC's avatar

Minor detail.

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cdbunch's avatar

Yeah. The word of God redundantly telling the story of creation and the details don't jibe. I expect better from an omniscient deity.

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jomicur's avatar

I'd expect better from a freshman in a remedial writing class.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

He needed an editor. The bible reads like a rough draft.

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cdbunch's avatar

No. *I* need an editor. What he needs is a better class of ghostwriter. Maybe he can have a big fish swallow Mr. King until he agrees.

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E.A. Blair's avatar

If it were a manuscript, there isn't an editor in any publishing house in the world who wouldn't reject it and send it back so fast the friction would char the paper.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Hell, Christian publisher Thomas Nelson pulled serial liar and pseudo-historian David Barton's book on Thomas Jefferson from publication after it had already been on the stands.

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larry parker's avatar

Jesus is a descendent of Shem. Supposably. : )

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Zizzer-Zazzer-Zuzz's avatar

I prefer Curly.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

That would be a stretch even for the bible. :D

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larry parker's avatar

The bible is nothing but stretch.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

The one part of Stretch Armstrong that SHOULD'VE been available for a gay or bi kid to stretch wasn't included.

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jomicur's avatar

We were too busy stretching our own, I guess.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Exactly my point. Fictional characters related to other fictional characters. :)

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Zizzer-Zazzer-Zuzz's avatar

There aren't enough people naming their kids Zerubbabel these days.

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Whitney's avatar

The best part of that image is that it follows Joseph's genealogy, 𝒂𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉 𝒉𝒆'𝒔 𝑱𝒆𝒔𝒖𝒔'𝒔 𝒇𝒂𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓.

This time on Jerry Springer.....

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NOGODZ20's avatar

I figured you got that from the conflicting 'genealogies' of Jesus.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Close enough.

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jomicur's avatar

Jesus was one of Noah's sons. And he was the only sober one.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

He wasn't on the ark at first. After the flood happened, he had to catch up by walking to it. Once aboard, he'd turn water into wine and then got them all drunk and singing sea shanties.

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XJC's avatar

Jesus, Inc. (NYSE: JEEZ)

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wreck's avatar

“What happens when the bus hits Ken?”

I hope that the bus is okay.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Won't someone think of the buses?

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XJC's avatar

If it's an electric bus, the impact will be minimal because of the heavy battery. Technology that reduces global warming AND rids the world of Ken Ham? THAT is progress.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

His mother let him drive ?

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David Graf's avatar

Well, I'm glad for Hemant that Ken Ham will have a successor who will keep things going after his death. Otherwise, what would Hemant do if he couldn't continue running those series of columns on attendance at Ham's museum? LOL!

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Anri's avatar

He could run a series on how Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead.

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XJC's avatar

Run for President?

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Pretty sure Hemant could focus on any number of Christian institutions and personalities on a regular basis. :)

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

False Morticia & Beef Tallow Woman.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Has the first one ever finally turned off her TV and picked up her bible? We need to be updated on these things.

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cdbunch's avatar

I miss hearing about Monica's latest obsession. It was better than TV Guide.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Her messiah tells her what to do if she sees something that offends her.

If she truly took her bible and beliefs literally, she'd have been blinded long ago. Like so many other cristers, she's a fraud.

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Richard S. Russell's avatar

Did I read that right? This group raised $2,000,000 for a legal defense fund and gave $100,000 to the accused party they were purporting to defend? And the other $1,900,000 went ...... where?

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

christian math.

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larry parker's avatar

Heavenly overhead.

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RegularJoe's avatar

Phase 3: Profit!

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cdbunch's avatar

From the fundraiser's archived page:

𝑂𝑛 𝑏𝑒ℎ𝑎𝑙𝑓 𝑜𝑓 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝐴𝑢𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑎𝑛 𝐶ℎ𝑟𝑖𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑎𝑛 𝐿𝑜𝑏𝑏𝑦, 𝐼 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑠𝑝𝑜𝑘𝑒𝑛 𝑡𝑜 𝐼𝑠𝑟𝑎𝑒𝑙 𝐹𝑜𝑙𝑎𝑢 𝑡𝑜 𝑙𝑒𝑡 ℎ𝑖𝑚 𝑘𝑛𝑜𝑤 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝐴𝐶𝐿 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑏𝑒 𝑑𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 $100,000 𝑡𝑜 ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑙𝑒𝑔𝑎𝑙 𝑑𝑒𝑓𝑒𝑛𝑐𝑒, 𝑏𝑒𝑐𝑎𝑢𝑠𝑒 𝑖𝑡’𝑠 𝑟𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑖𝑡 𝑠𝑒𝑡𝑠 𝑎𝑛 𝑖𝑚𝑝𝑜𝑟𝑡𝑎𝑛𝑡 𝑙𝑒𝑔𝑎𝑙 𝑝𝑟𝑒𝑐𝑒𝑑𝑒𝑛𝑡.

𝐼 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑎𝑙𝑠𝑜 𝑜𝑓𝑓𝑒𝑟𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜 ℎ𝑜𝑠𝑡 ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑜𝑛𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑒 𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑒𝑎𝑙 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑓𝑢𝑛𝑑𝑠 ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑜𝑛 𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑤𝑒𝑏𝑠𝑖𝑡𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑑 ℎ𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑠 𝑎𝑐𝑐𝑒𝑝𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑜𝑓𝑓𝑒𝑟.

𝐴𝑙𝑙 𝑔𝑖𝑓𝑡𝑠 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑔𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑜𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑤𝑒𝑏 𝑝𝑎𝑔𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑏𝑒 𝑑𝑒𝑝𝑜𝑠𝑖𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑜 𝑎 𝑡𝑟𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑎𝑐𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑝𝑎𝑦 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝐼𝑠𝑟𝑎𝑒𝑙 𝐹𝑜𝑙𝑎𝑢’𝑠 𝑙𝑒𝑔𝑎𝑙 𝑐𝑎𝑠𝑒.

So apparently the 100K was in addition to the 2M raised and the money went into a trust. Once the case was settled, it would be interesting to see what happened to the remainder of the trust.

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

So apparently, Ken has found another s̵a̵p̵ ̵i̵d̵i̵o̵t̵ believer to take his place. Have to say, the most disappointing part of this whole business is that there are, indeed, younger people who believe the tripe that Ham and his cronies spout. I wonder if Kenny has shared the Ark Park's P&L statements with the new boy, or if that kid is prepared to manage an organization which is figuratively flying about one mile an hour above stall speed.

It'll be interesting to see how Iles deals with all of that ... IF he can.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Froze out his own family to do it, too.

Wonder how they felt about that and if this will...your should pardon the expression...boomerang on him?

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OwossoHarpist's avatar

Both men are no different than that Stupid Idiot Don who lies, grifts, runs everything to the ground, angrily lashes out the instant someone exposes their lies and fantasies, etc.

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Psittacus Ebrius's avatar

Just what the world needs - a Tucker Down Under.

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