Best case scenario: the religious nutters kill each other off over who gets to do the forced conversions. But that still leaves the Billionaire Boys Club....
He was supposed to marry the girl, let the kid get to about 2 and divorce her in a nasty custody battle which he lost. His mama didn't teach him right.
I do enjoy a good schism over power and money with neither side recognizing just how much it makes them look like petty and shallow assholes instead of people who are supposed to be filled with love, humility, and wisdom.
Oh they are still filled with love, humility, and wisdom. That's Sundays. Monday-Friday is 'conduct legal battles and takeovers to grab as much money and assets as you can.'
I have three words for Southern Methodist University: GO FOR IT. The parent organization you have been associated with wants to continue to exercise control over you and your students, while you have clearly indicated that you have no desire to be so controlled. Your school trustees said as much, 34-1. It's pretty clear to me that SMU has the means and the will to stand on its own.
The statement from the SMU president is a bit telling, The school wants to remain an intregral part of the denomination, they just want the freedom to do their thing without threat of veto from the denomination. Amend the charter from forever owned and controlled to just forever owned. The school gets its autonomy, and the church keeps its prestige.
They may be kidding themselves. All that needs to happen is for a hot-button issue to come up – like trans rights – and watch SMU and the UMC go at it, hammer and tongs.
It's worth keeping in mind, too: many Christian organizations are about CONTROL. That doesn't necessarily mean that the UMC absolutely wants to maintain its hold on Southern Methodist University.
But if I were an SMU administrator, I wouldn't take my eye off of the UMC for one second.
Give them a % of board votes equivalent to the % of school O&M costs they cover. UMC wants to control SMU policy, then they can 'walk the talk' in terms of real actual support for the school.
How can the various versions of Christianity convince anyone to join, when there so many versions of the “ULTIMATE TRUTH”. If Christianity was the true faith there wouldn’t be so many types of Christians (that goes for the various versions of the bible as well).
Thing is, we woke up to the fractious nature of Christianity a while back all 40,000-plus denominations of it. The average guy doesn't think in those terms, or simply isn't aware / doesn't care.
And I honestly wonder whether it would matter if he DID know.
Rednecks know the history of Christianity about as well as they know what is in their “holy” book. Any history that a redneck knows comes from fox channel, their clergy, or Hollywood. In fact, if Hollywood would make a movie about how an American discovered fire, or invented the wheel, or that an American discovered America; 98% of the rednecks would believe that to be true. This is the same group that would tell you that Jesus was not a Jew, but a Christian. I was told by a Christian that if the King James Bible is good enough for Jesus, then it is good enough for them. How can someone counter that level of stupidity?
Christianity was fractured from the beginning. It was only when one branch got the power of the state behind it that gave us 700 years of "heretics" before the Great Schism. And the fracturing continues.
One of the epistles actually has the very first No True Christian argument. I can’t be arsed to look it up —NoGodz can likely cite it from memory — but it’s the one that says they were never one of us.
"These people left our churches, but they never really belonged with us; otherwise they would have stayed with us. When they left, it proved that they did not belong with us."
"12 million members" Scary, so many in the USA that are indoctrinated and organized. Believing in superstitions, myths, and invisible beings under controlling fear. Religion at its best.
Remember, these counts tend to be high. Even legit organizations like PEW will use self-reported affiliation to determine membership, which doesn't really tell you how many people actually, tangibly involve themself with the church. When organizations like PEW track "goes to Sunday weekly services of..." numbers, they tend to be much smaller than the number of people calling themselves members.
Numbers from organizations like UMC tend to be even more inflated; they probably count anyone who was ever baptized in a Methodist church, even if the person never set foot in one as an adult.
I remember being about 8 or 9, and it must have been a Wednesday evening, because I was listening to our GA leader talk about different religions that claimed to be Christian and how the Baptist church came the "closest" to what we believed was the the, I don't know, "the right way to worship" I guess. I can't remember exactly how she phrased it. It was so long ago.
But even at 8 or 9, I had been in a Methodist Church a few times with cousins, and one of my aunts was Episcopalian. I knew there was nothing in the Bible that stated in detail how we were supposed to conduct a church service; what hymns we were supposed to sing, or whether the pastor wore robes or an ordinary suit and tie. Those were the main differences I could see right away, and I thought they didn't matter, because everybody believed in God and Jesus, right? At that age, I didn't have an in-depth knowledge of theology and dogma, so I assumed these surface details were what she was referring to, and I honestly couldn't see how we "knew" we had gotten those details right, nor why they were important.
But I had also learned a long time before then that We Don't Ask Questions, so this was yet another puzzled musing that entered my head. For the next few weeks, I'd chew on it from time to time, but eventually, it just kind of floated away and I forgot about it. This happened with a lot of questions I wanted to ask, but didn't, because dealing with the fallout from asking questions was more of a hassle than not knowing, and I still wouldn't have a decent answer.
Note that both sides here would undoubtedly claim the usual religious superior morality, but have now come to a secular court for a decision because they can't agree.
Why bother having a 'god' at all if said deity can't even resolve internal disputes in a satisfactory manner? What would the point of that be? For pity's sake, people, use your head for something other than a battering ram!
Well, you know, got to stick to those rules, had no choice but to use one on the poor soul who was just trying to keep YHWH’s holy relic from touching the ground.
This is not surprising. We are a fractured society. What we have come to see is that there are people who are open to inclusion and broad civil rights and people who want a very defined society - it isn't just the Methodist church which is dying on this hill, it is the whole Country. We are no longer that "One nation, indivisible..." We are 2 nations standing on the edges of this divide - a chasm, really - unable to find/make common ground. I don't think the twain can ever meet again.
That god is the huge problem here. It is the one full of genocides, mass murders and mass abortions. To paraphrase Thomas Paine, Believing in bigoted gods creates bigoted people.
Believers settling their differences in a secular court? Teh bibelz says that's a no-no.
"When one of you has a dispute with another believer, how dare you file a lawsuit and ask a secular court to decide the matter instead of taking it to other believers!"
I heard on the news in the 2013 that male flasher that was flashing women in the middle of February when the temperature was -40 degrees Celsius (I don’t know what it is in Fahrenheit) in Hamilton Ontario. That is one piece of male anatomy that should never be exposed to -40 degrees Celsius (frostbite take on a whole new meaning).
We had a cold snap a couple years ago, temps were down to -50 below at night. Just for the hell of it, I went out into the backyard naked (very late, no lights) just to see how bad it was. While not pleasant, it wasn't terrible. Of course it was only 30 seconds or so.
Just remember that simple formula: 5/9ths F minus C, except after T, carry the 1, multiply by the coefficient of gravity near a vacuum (cleaner), and you're left with the answer in base 13.
Just don't talk about it too loudly. If MAGAts get wind of it, they'll believe it.
OTOH it would be hilarious to hear about a bunch of imbeciles googling "hand abortions" and worrying about how to skirt abortion bans in deep red states.
Stupid is, that stupid does. Man, there is way too many stupid people out there. It is amazing that they are allowed out in public without supervision. I would also demand they carry a sign that say: “I am a goddamm fucking moron, please don’t let me hurt myself with sharp and pointed objects”.
As if national politics weren’t convoluted enough! Thanks for giving my brain a distraction this morning. Lawyers certainly seem to be making hay lately, don’t they.
According to Republicans, GTA6 is “ultra woke” because the cast of criminals are multicultural. According to them, ONLY white, straight, Christian males are competent criminals.
Black ice took the life of Metallica bass player Cliff Burton, but the biblical god spared Frank DiMaria? Further evidence that the deity doesn't exist and this clown and the others in that vehicle were damned lucky. Hope the repair bill is yuge.
And maybe someone should inform him about the Village People and the origin/lyrics of that song the MAGAts plagiarized. Can't wait to see the expression on his (quite probably) homophobic face.
SMU wants a divorce, but they signed up for a covenant marriage with UMC.
😂 Perfect analogy.
Hat tip to Monday's article.
Yes indeed. I can’t imagine wanting to wear handcuffs where only a special saw will cut them off.
You're right; the fun wears off for both after about half an hour.
So SMU just needs to hire a stud to seduce the UMC, then they have infidelity as a reason for divorce.
I’m sure there’s a pool boy somewhere in need of some money…
OMG, that is perfect! Well done! I gave you as many likes as I was allowed.
The Texas Supreme Court will make them both turn Baptist.
After which the United States Supreme Court will make them turn Catholic! 🤪
Here we go round the mulberry bush....
Best case scenario: the religious nutters kill each other off over who gets to do the forced conversions. But that still leaves the Billionaire Boys Club....
And hold a kegger.
Oh, that would be the US Supreme Court.
Which type of Baptist?
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Baptist_denominations
Whatever Mary Cooper is/was. Her local church kicked her out when Georgie had a kid out of wedlock. I don't recall if they ever let her back in.
He was supposed to marry the girl, let the kid get to about 2 and divorce her in a nasty custody battle which he lost. His mama didn't teach him right.
He did marry her and started a new TV series. The marriage will end in divorce though. It says so right in the title.
When is that show on? I can never seem to find it on our channel listing screen. Is it streamed or something?
I watch it. It is funny but I cannot identify with Georgie the way I could with Sheldon.
I don't know. I haven't watched, just seen clips on YouTube.
Wow. That hydra has been beheaded so many times it's indestructible.
A fate worse than death. I speak from experience.
I do enjoy a good schism over power and money with neither side recognizing just how much it makes them look like petty and shallow assholes instead of people who are supposed to be filled with love, humility, and wisdom.
Oh they are still filled with love, humility, and wisdom. That's Sundays. Monday-Friday is 'conduct legal battles and takeovers to grab as much money and assets as you can.'
Saturday is "Rest up for Sunday's charade."
No. Saturday is for all those single Christian men to go find the Catholic schoolgirls and use the loophole.
Just what I was going to write.
What devil have you been talking to that told you what I was going to write?
EEEEEEEEEEEEWVILLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!
I’m going to go write it anyway.
What a crock of false equivalence!
I have three words for Southern Methodist University: GO FOR IT. The parent organization you have been associated with wants to continue to exercise control over you and your students, while you have clearly indicated that you have no desire to be so controlled. Your school trustees said as much, 34-1. It's pretty clear to me that SMU has the means and the will to stand on its own.
So it should.
The statement from the SMU president is a bit telling, The school wants to remain an intregral part of the denomination, they just want the freedom to do their thing without threat of veto from the denomination. Amend the charter from forever owned and controlled to just forever owned. The school gets its autonomy, and the church keeps its prestige.
They may be kidding themselves. All that needs to happen is for a hot-button issue to come up – like trans rights – and watch SMU and the UMC go at it, hammer and tongs.
It's worth keeping in mind, too: many Christian organizations are about CONTROL. That doesn't necessarily mean that the UMC absolutely wants to maintain its hold on Southern Methodist University.
But if I were an SMU administrator, I wouldn't take my eye off of the UMC for one second.
Give them a % of board votes equivalent to the % of school O&M costs they cover. UMC wants to control SMU policy, then they can 'walk the talk' in terms of real actual support for the school.
How can the various versions of Christianity convince anyone to join, when there so many versions of the “ULTIMATE TRUTH”. If Christianity was the true faith there wouldn’t be so many types of Christians (that goes for the various versions of the bible as well).
Thing is, we woke up to the fractious nature of Christianity a while back all 40,000-plus denominations of it. The average guy doesn't think in those terms, or simply isn't aware / doesn't care.
And I honestly wonder whether it would matter if he DID know.
Rednecks know the history of Christianity about as well as they know what is in their “holy” book. Any history that a redneck knows comes from fox channel, their clergy, or Hollywood. In fact, if Hollywood would make a movie about how an American discovered fire, or invented the wheel, or that an American discovered America; 98% of the rednecks would believe that to be true. This is the same group that would tell you that Jesus was not a Jew, but a Christian. I was told by a Christian that if the King James Bible is good enough for Jesus, then it is good enough for them. How can someone counter that level of stupidity?
“ Any history that a redneck knows comes from fox channel, their clergy, or Hollywood.”
Or the History Channel. I will never forget the HC show on aliens altering the course of the Civil War.
Christianity was fractured from the beginning. It was only when one branch got the power of the state behind it that gave us 700 years of "heretics" before the Great Schism. And the fracturing continues.
https://media0.giphy.com/media/SQ4DAQF1FYesM/giphy.gif?cid=6c09b952pzyiq7cvrkfx0aw9r6a7oyq0v6lxu11qjtp5jmk4&ep=v1_gifs_search&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g
I actually remember watching that on Saturday morning cartoons! Man, I suddenly feel so very old.
I can still hear the theme song in my head...
Here’s one you may not have seen. It was made especially to accompany The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle live-action film
youtu.be/UEelXM9Tggs
One of the epistles actually has the very first No True Christian argument. I can’t be arsed to look it up —NoGodz can likely cite it from memory — but it’s the one that says they were never one of us.
1 John 2:19. :)
That took you an entire minute?!?!
Here's the verse:
"These people left our churches, but they never really belonged with us; otherwise they would have stayed with us. When they left, it proved that they did not belong with us."
"12 million members" Scary, so many in the USA that are indoctrinated and organized. Believing in superstitions, myths, and invisible beings under controlling fear. Religion at its best.
The MAGA cult loves it.
Remember, these counts tend to be high. Even legit organizations like PEW will use self-reported affiliation to determine membership, which doesn't really tell you how many people actually, tangibly involve themself with the church. When organizations like PEW track "goes to Sunday weekly services of..." numbers, they tend to be much smaller than the number of people calling themselves members.
Numbers from organizations like UMC tend to be even more inflated; they probably count anyone who was ever baptized in a Methodist church, even if the person never set foot in one as an adult.
Agreed, IMO membership is support for what one is a member of. Doesn't matter if one practices or participate in the origination.
The MAGA cult has taken advantage of the controlling fear, misinformation and mistrust many religious originations provide.
Better not to be part of any religious organization. Believe what one wants on one's own.
In MAGA We Trust?
I remember being about 8 or 9, and it must have been a Wednesday evening, because I was listening to our GA leader talk about different religions that claimed to be Christian and how the Baptist church came the "closest" to what we believed was the the, I don't know, "the right way to worship" I guess. I can't remember exactly how she phrased it. It was so long ago.
But even at 8 or 9, I had been in a Methodist Church a few times with cousins, and one of my aunts was Episcopalian. I knew there was nothing in the Bible that stated in detail how we were supposed to conduct a church service; what hymns we were supposed to sing, or whether the pastor wore robes or an ordinary suit and tie. Those were the main differences I could see right away, and I thought they didn't matter, because everybody believed in God and Jesus, right? At that age, I didn't have an in-depth knowledge of theology and dogma, so I assumed these surface details were what she was referring to, and I honestly couldn't see how we "knew" we had gotten those details right, nor why they were important.
But I had also learned a long time before then that We Don't Ask Questions, so this was yet another puzzled musing that entered my head. For the next few weeks, I'd chew on it from time to time, but eventually, it just kind of floated away and I forgot about it. This happened with a lot of questions I wanted to ask, but didn't, because dealing with the fallout from asking questions was more of a hassle than not knowing, and I still wouldn't have a decent answer.
Agreed. The UMC doesn’t offer them much financially and what if UMC changes its mind again? With Orange Fuckwit in power, anything can happen.
Christians. They want us to agree with them when they can't even agree with each other.
As attested to by the thousands of xtian sects. Forrest Valkai mentions 45,000 the other night on Atheist Experience. Such unity...
I have seen a guy lately discoursing about why the Pilgrims had it right while the Puritans had it wrong. Or vice versa. I neither know nor care.
I’m like, no idiot, they were both wrong.
Note that both sides here would undoubtedly claim the usual religious superior morality, but have now come to a secular court for a decision because they can't agree.
Why bother having a 'god' at all if said deity can't even resolve internal disputes in a satisfactory manner? What would the point of that be? For pity's sake, people, use your head for something other than a battering ram!
Satisfactory? For whom?
Both sides are Christians in that situation, so in theory they're both satisfied when their Jesus tells them they are. /s
Lightning bolts take a lot out of a deity. "When 14 billion years old, you reach, fewer lightning bolts you will throw."
YHVH stole lightning from Zeus, but he didn't steal the knowledge of how to properly wield those bolts.
Well, you know, got to stick to those rules, had no choice but to use one on the poor soul who was just trying to keep YHWH’s holy relic from touching the ground.
He probably would have wiped out the whole tribe if the stupid thing *had* touched the ground.
Starting Jan 20, I’m going to belong to the “I Told You So” Party. Sign up anytime
I have resisted buying a yard sign saying just that, but i'm sure it will happen sometime this year.
Don't blame me...
https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/61COj3qNhwL._AC_UF894,1000_QL80_.jpg
DON'T LOOK AT ME
I VOTED FOR THE SANE PERSON
Probably pick up some used from 2017.
Money idea in a couple of months: Don't blame me I voted with the cat ladies.
I LIKE it!
I remember these from when I was little.
https://i.etsystatic.com/7714082/r/il/cd6801/4238923150/il_570xN.4238923150_jw4v.jpg
That seems like another lifetime.
I still have the "Cats for Kamala" sign. I may just put that back out.
So will they be the Judean People's Front or the People's Front of Judea?
Which one has the most pious hats?
That guy over there.
Judas H. Christ!!!
Splitter!
Judean Popular People’s Front?
Yes!
This is not surprising. We are a fractured society. What we have come to see is that there are people who are open to inclusion and broad civil rights and people who want a very defined society - it isn't just the Methodist church which is dying on this hill, it is the whole Country. We are no longer that "One nation, indivisible..." We are 2 nations standing on the edges of this divide - a chasm, really - unable to find/make common ground. I don't think the twain can ever meet again.
Ever since we ironically inserted "under God" into our pledge between "one nation" and "indivisible".
That god is the huge problem here. It is the one full of genocides, mass murders and mass abortions. To paraphrase Thomas Paine, Believing in bigoted gods creates bigoted people.
Gotta love it when they¹ form circular firing squads.
(¹ Theofundi nutters, Trumpublicans, etc.)
every accusation is a confession
https://www.cnn.com/2025/01/08/media/trump-fox-news-town-hall-questions-maria-bartiromo/index.html
Oh, Fox will be investigating? I’ll bet. They’ll be looking for the person who snitched and not the questions leaker.
Oh, gee whiz, could Fox News and Trump be colluding with each other? Golly-winkies!!!
Gee, didn't der kinder führer accuse Harris of that?
Republican Projection. Goebbels. Every accusation is a confession.
Yes.
Believers settling their differences in a secular court? Teh bibelz says that's a no-no.
"When one of you has a dispute with another believer, how dare you file a lawsuit and ask a secular court to decide the matter instead of taking it to other believers!"
-- 1 Corinthians 6 (NLT)
Oops.
One Corinthian isn't going to cut it, you need at least two.
Do they wear rich leather?
Of course. Assless chaps I do believe.
I heard on the news in the 2013 that male flasher that was flashing women in the middle of February when the temperature was -40 degrees Celsius (I don’t know what it is in Fahrenheit) in Hamilton Ontario. That is one piece of male anatomy that should never be exposed to -40 degrees Celsius (frostbite take on a whole new meaning).
We had a cold snap a couple years ago, temps were down to -50 below at night. Just for the hell of it, I went out into the backyard naked (very late, no lights) just to see how bad it was. While not pleasant, it wasn't terrible. Of course it was only 30 seconds or so.
-40C is also -40F
Also gives a very different meaning for the expression “blue balls”.
Just remember that simple formula: 5/9ths F minus C, except after T, carry the 1, multiply by the coefficient of gravity near a vacuum (cleaner), and you're left with the answer in base 13.
(Also, Google will convert for you. 😉)
Most people can double or halve a number, you just need to worry about the +/-32 bit
C to F: 9/5 = 1.8 = (2-0.2)
EX: 40 x (2-0.2) = 80-8 = 72
F to C: 5/9 = 0.555... = 1/2 + 1/20 + 1/200
EX: 72 * 0.555 = 36 + 3.6 + .36 + ... = 40
Or you can use the unit conversion on your puters calculator.
youtu.be/UIKGV2cTgqA
Aren't chaps "assless by definition? Otherwise they'd be "pants", yes?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QXG6NvBRcrI
AS IF the bible means anything to them. It is only useful for determining who to hate in the name of their "loving" jeezyboy.
I think they should fight to the death, like thunderdome style. Two goes in, and if the rest of us is lucky neither will come out.
Latex gloves?
https://scontent-ord5-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/472788943_28604156955834731_7582664678361758294_n.jpg?_nc_cat=103&ccb=1-7&_nc_sid=aa7b47&_nc_ohc=MuHk_-IapOEQ7kNvgH2yRVS&_nc_zt=23&_nc_ht=scontent-ord5-2.xx&_nc_gid=A7fV24gz3Sy42g5Y8V935y7&oh=00_AYCZODcEGFt_p9f3XfmCX-KnX1xCjxTo_SU5J70SlBCOSQ&oe=67847A30
Someone needs a refresher course in reproductive biology, I think ... 🤪
Just don't talk about it too loudly. If MAGAts get wind of it, they'll believe it.
OTOH it would be hilarious to hear about a bunch of imbeciles googling "hand abortions" and worrying about how to skirt abortion bans in deep red states.
Stupid is, that stupid does. Man, there is way too many stupid people out there. It is amazing that they are allowed out in public without supervision. I would also demand they carry a sign that say: “I am a goddamm fucking moron, please don’t let me hurt myself with sharp and pointed objects”.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VMlJ5MClQJ0
Thanks cdbunch, I remember watching that comedy act.
Like he's never done it. 😏
One in the hand is better than none in the bush.
And spermicide lube just to be sure.
Wonder how many babies he's going to have.
As if national politics weren’t convoluted enough! Thanks for giving my brain a distraction this morning. Lawyers certainly seem to be making hay lately, don’t they.
https://www.comicsands.com/dei-watchdog-video-games-woke
According to Republicans, GTA6 is “ultra woke” because the cast of criminals are multicultural. According to them, ONLY white, straight, Christian males are competent criminals.
Straight, White Anglo Male Protestants. SWAMPers
Also known a inbred, brain dead, and born again or “REDNECK”
The typical MAGA.
https://theleft.org/god-has-cleared-a-path/
Make Automobiles Glide Away.
Is there a rendition of "YMCA" that doesn't suck?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yVmOPHsVM3U
I think I like Leo's version better. :)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNY0VAcD2Sg
I see what you did there!
"God has cleared a path"
That YHVH. Such a prankster.
Black ice took the life of Metallica bass player Cliff Burton, but the biblical god spared Frank DiMaria? Further evidence that the deity doesn't exist and this clown and the others in that vehicle were damned lucky. Hope the repair bill is yuge.
And maybe someone should inform him about the Village People and the origin/lyrics of that song the MAGAts plagiarized. Can't wait to see the expression on his (quite probably) homophobic face.
He'd just stick his fingers in his ears and yell "Fake News!" There are no facts. There's what he wants to believe, and damned librul lies.
I'm going to write a song called oh schadenfreude – sung to the tune of Oh Christmas tree.