252 Comments
User's avatar
Stephen's avatar

I guess the town could emulate them and shut off their water, gas and electrical service on Sundays. So the utilities wouldn't have to work on sunday.

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Joan the Dork's avatar

Their beliefs are only rigid until they face minor inconvenience. Then, like magic, making exceptions is a-ok with the goddything!

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Stephen's avatar

Its like "OBEY THE LORD... EXCEPT FOR SHRIMP AND MIXED FABRICS"

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Pants (for everyone).

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Pork products, adultery, divorce...

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Joe King's avatar

Don't forget tattoos!

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Graven images like 10 Commandment monuments and Ham's "boat," for example.

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Richard S. Russell's avatar

I just checked my coin purse. Yup, still full of graven images!

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

The operant question right now is: how much of the town is willing to go toe-to-toe with this church, face them down and say, bluntly, NO. You do NOT get to tell us how to conduct our business, on Sunday or any other day of the week.

This is how you confront a bully: with strength and determination. I sincerely hope the people of Norwich have those qualities.

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Maltnothops's avatar

Agreed. The non-bigots should make a point of patronizing any store that is open on Sunday. Secondarily, suggest to any business owner who is a member of the bigoted church that their own store won’t be patronized Monday-Saturday unless necessary.

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Mark's avatar

don't need to a damn thing. This church has no power

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mechtheist's avatar

The way minister visits businesses open on Sundays and threatens them sounds a lot like the mafia. To get away with that crap they must have a pretty sizeable percentage of the towns population. The rest of the town are being wimps, if the church members take to active demonization, then then it's time for payback, turn them into pariahs, use social media to it's offensive best. Ridicule and open contempt work pretty well, like stop calling the minister reverend or whatever, start using Don, call him the capo, say they're spreading the Goodfella News, reverse the boycott, let business owner members know you're using Amazon or the next town instead of their business. They could have a lot of fun with enough courage and the right attitude, taking it to the mattresses, going after this thing of theirs, let'em know they're not gonna let a bunch of goombahs shake them down anymore.

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Joan the Dork's avatar

Of course they use threats to make others do what they want... it's what their entire moral system is based on. 𝘖𝘣𝘦𝘺 𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘳 𝘨𝘰 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘭- it's literally the imperative that underpins their entire worldview, so naturally it's going to be how they treat everyone else when they have no other incentive (like the threat of actual, immediate, 𝘌𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘩𝘭𝘺 consequences) to be polite. The mob learned it from the Church- not the other way 'round.

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mechtheist's avatar

Oh, I agree entirely, it's just hilarious and disturbing that the preacher is going around acting like a mafia enforcer, they're not typically that blatant about it. It's not a coincidence that THE church and the mob are both Italian.

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Joe King's avatar

Where do you think the mob learned it?

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Lynn James's avatar

Minister visiting a business open on Sunday: "Nice little place you got here. Be too bad if something happened to it."

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larry parker's avatar

"...demonize any businesses that ignore their threats (leaving bad reviews, spreading rumors about them, etc)..."

Lying for Jesus, par for the course.

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painedumonde's avatar

Isn't it supposed to be Saturday?

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Joan the Dork's avatar

According to the Muslims, it's Friday. Even with only one goddything to keep track of, they can't manage to agree on which day to put their feet up...

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jomicur's avatar

God, like Joanne Woodward in The Three Faces of Eve, has multiple personalities. Three "persons," three Sabbaths. Makes perfect sense.

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Donrox's avatar

Yes, technically the Sabbath Day is Saturday. The early church changed the Lord's Day to Sunday, which already matched up with the day for worship of the sun. Easy for people to adjust to when

they were suddenly declared "Christians" by the emperor. Jehovah's Witnessess, Seventh Day Adventists, and some other sects join Jews in recognizing the Sabbath, and keeping it holy.

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Bob's avatar

Well, the bible is very clear, so...

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NOGODZ20's avatar

If you don't mind all the contradictions, that is. :)

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Maltnothops's avatar

But they are *clearly* contradictions!

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Tis true.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Christians whine about being disliked, but they're the ones who are bound and determined to make enemies by their jackass behavior. We could ignore them if they simply lived their lives and stopped messing with everyone else's.

But then again, Christians need enemies to fight, so they create them and then yell "PERSECUTION!" when they are challenged.

*smh*

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Guerillasurgeon's avatar

I just posted this on another site. I seem to be using it more and more often these days.

"God help us, a large proportion of the world's problems would be solved if everyone, but especially "Christians™" would learn to mind their own damn business – especially about what people do with their wedding tackle."

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XJC's avatar

Hatred motivated by 'fear of other' is the gift that keeps on giving in the delusional world of Jesus, Inc.

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XJC's avatar

It's why Trump enjoys so much support from the evangelicals and hard-core Catholics...they aspire to his level of vengeance and spite. After all, it's what Jesus would do, right?

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

I want someone to remind pastors if work is prohibited on Sunday churches should stay close too, after all they are payed (tithes or salary) so legally it's work.

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ericc's avatar

Assuming there's a sizeable population of non-church-goers, I recommend either:

"15% off everything Sundays."

or

"Free donut with every $10 of sales. Keepin' it holey."

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larry parker's avatar

Offer free crackers and juice, but the good stuff. Ritz and Welch's.

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Zizzer-Zazzer-Zuzz's avatar

One mass I went to with extended family, my sister and law and I were eying each other after communion. We both said almost simultaneously we wanted to go back through because the wine was really good.

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

Tropicana.

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jomicur's avatar

"I know people that have tried to open businesses and be open on a Sunday and they've been visited by the minister saying, 'if you stay open on Sunday … you'll be out of business.'"

Can someone please explain to me how that doesn't constitute criminal extortion? I honestly don't know a thing about extortion law in Canada, but if they have such laws at all, that's got to be actionable. And seeing a church busted for extortion would be so damn sweet.

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

Religious privi... exception.

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Bagen Onuts's avatar

Actually, threatening the kkkristers with extortion when they play the hell card works very well on Yahoo forums. Someho9w their omnieverythinggod cannot help them in court.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

"If you stay open on Sunday, you'll be out of business."

Funny, but in light of the downward spiral of church attendance and the rise of "nones," we could say the very same thing to ministers.

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Zorginipsoundsor's avatar

Someone should open a storefront for their online business and stay open on Sunday. There is a store called Frisky Business in my zip code, and in all the years they have been there, I have only seen a handful of people go in.

NSFW: http://shop.friskybusinessstpete.com.myfreesexstore.com/

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NOGODZ20's avatar

They have better staying power than most houses of worship these days. :)

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NOGODZ20's avatar

This opens the door to some cross-swinging ammosexual waltzing into a business establishment and executing everyone inside for "violating" the Sabbath.

(At least it would in the US)

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

At this point in the US arc on gun violence, sadly, that wouldn't surprise me at all. My only hope would be that the perpetrator would be caught BEFORE he could either eat his gun or attempt Suicide By Cop, whereupon he would find himself in a court of law and 𝗚𝗘𝗧 𝗣𝗨𝗡𝗜𝗦𝗛𝗘𝗗 𝗧𝗢 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗙𝗨𝗟𝗟𝗘𝗦𝗧 𝗘𝗫𝗧𝗘𝗡𝗧 𝗢𝗙 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗟𝗔𝗪!!!

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Val Uptuous NotAgain's avatar

Like Rittenhouse?

The courts are falling to gun violence too. The USA is very very sick. And it is spreading outside our borders.

Sorry, I don’t mean to be so cynical.

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Guerillasurgeon's avatar

Couldn't blame any American for being cynical at the moment. I just learned that we have some sort of sovereign citizen movement – some guy assaulted a local government worker because reasons. When you guys sneeze everyone catches a cold. 😁

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jomicur's avatar

Why not? "The Cynic questions everything, in order to learn what is true." --Epictetus Sounds like a good description of healthy skepticism.

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Lynn James's avatar

In this current political climate, he'd most likely be canonized.

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Troublesh00ter's avatar

Could be ... though I'd far rather see him be CANNON-IZED! 😁

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Lynn James's avatar

:-D

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

OT related to you : I just watched a documentary on Mongol Empire, about 1/200 men are related to Genghis Khan and the men of his family.

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CozmoTheMagician's avatar

Even more are related to Cohen the Barbarian. O_o

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

There is a French Conan the Barbarian parody called "Conar le Barbant" (can be translated as Dumbass the Annoying).

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NOGODZ20's avatar

I have Mongolian warlord blood in me.

I wonder...

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Zizzer-Zazzer-Zuzz's avatar

I am immortal, I have inside me blood of kings, yeah, yeah

I have no rival, no man can be my equal

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NOGODZ20's avatar

Where did I put that sword...

Too warm for a greatcoat. :)

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

What about Chinese clothes ?

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Black Hole and DM mourner's avatar

It would explain your feminists positions 😋

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OwossoHarpist's avatar

Who died and made them boss besides "God?"

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oraxx's avatar

Well, Jesus didn't really die did he? He had a bad weekend, then went back to being God.

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NOGODZ20's avatar

He didn't even have a bad weekend if you go by Luke. Went straight to heaven the moment he stopped breathing.

He sure wasn't much of a god while he was on Earth. Essentially NOTHING changed.

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Joe King's avatar

Vito Corleone.

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Joe King's avatar

Usually it's just threats of hellfire. Actual racketeering? Why am I not surprised at this escalation?

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OwossoHarpist's avatar

Holy racketeering, Batman!

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larry parker's avatar

Nice business you have here, be a shame if something happened to it.

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RegularJoe's avatar

Nice cult house you had there, shame about that conflagration.....😉

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NOGODZ20's avatar

If that cult house is in the bible belt during Act of God season, something probably WILL happen to it. YHVHs not very good at protecting his worship dens.

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Lynn James's avatar

Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice!

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Lynn James's avatar

Oh you beat me to it by hours....I should have scrolled down a little further before commenting! *embarrassed grin)*

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NoOne of Consequence's avatar

Ah yes, threatening people who aren't Christian to follow Christian rules. A very christian thing to do, although very unchristlike. Good job, Canada, you're one step closer to the US wanting to annex you.

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Lynn James's avatar

Shhhhhhh! You're giving away our position!

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oraxx's avatar

Be it in Canada, or any other country, the preachers can talk about their loving Jesus and the glorious afterlife from now on, but there is nothing they crave so much as power and control in this world. Power few groups would be more ill-equipped to exercise. The evangelicals dream of a world where everyone needs their permission for pretty much everything.

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